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Defector

Luis Paez-Pumar

Granit Xhaka of Arsenal is held back by Alisson Becker as they argue with Trent Alexander-Arnold of Liverpool who is held back by Ibrahima Konate during the Premier League match between Liverpool FC and Arsenal FC at Anfield on April 09, 2023 in Liverpool, England.

Soccer

The Winner Of Liverpool-Arsenal Was Manchester City

Samer Kalaf

Rudy Gobert swings at Kyle Anderson in a team huddle.

The Timberwolves Are Throwing Punches At The Worst Possible Time

charismatic megafauna (they/them)

Sabrina Imbler

a photo of a coprolite (fossil poop) with bite marks taken out of it

Creaturefector

Behold An Ancient Fish’s Moment Of Sheer Regret

Lauren Theisen

Tage Thompson pounds gloves with his teammates on the bench

The Sabres Still Have Their Dream

Associate US Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas poses for the official photo at the Supreme Court, dressed in black robes.

Politics

Clarence Thomas’s Billionaire Sponsor Owns Some Weird Nazi Stuff

The Rays Have Chewed Up The Worst Teams In Baseball And Spat Them In The Garbage

Kelsey McKinney

Zillowing Out

A £700,000 House Worthy Of A Song

Maitreyi Anantharaman

DALLAS, TX - APRIL 02: First lady Jill Biden talks with guests during the 2023 NCAA Women's Basketball Tournament National Championship at American Airlines Center on April 2, 2023 in Dallas, Texas.

College Basketball

Angel Reese And Jill Biden Achieve Detente

David Roth

Former President Donald Trump arrives for his arraignment at Manhattan Criminal Court on April 4, 2023.

It Only Seems Unprecedented

two gloved hands holding a mummified brown squirrel in the shape of a perfect sphere

What’s Inside The Fur Sphere?

Staff Writer
Find me on Signal @DefectorChris.19

Chris Thompson

Shaquille O'Neal wears a hat and becomes practically invisible.

Shaquille O’Neal Is On The Run From FTX Lawsuit Process Servers

Tom Ley

SALT LAKE CITY, UTAH - FEBRUARY 18: Zion Williamson of the New Orleans Pelicans speaks during media availability as part of 2023 NBA All Star Weekend on February 18, 2023 in Salt Lake City, Utah. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement.

Another Zion Williamson Season Ends In The Toilet

Patrick Redford

Carlsen cries out in anguish after the misclick

Chess

Magnus Carlsen Crashes Out Of Final Tournament As World Champion With Hilarious Blunder

Ben Tippett

MADRID, SPAIN - JULY 5: Russian Grandmaster competing under the FIDE flag Ian Nepomniachtchi receives the award as the winner of the competition (2nd from L) with Ding Liren of China, FIDE President Arkady Dvorkovich, Teimour Radjabov of Azerbaiyán and Jan-Krzysztof Duda of Poland during the 2022 FIDE Chess Candidates Tournament closing ceremony on July 5, 2022 in Madrid, Spain. (

The World Chess Championship Begins On The Edge Of The Unknown

Golf

LIV Golf And Its Representatives Are Having An Extremely Normal Masters Week

Giri Nathan

Report: Memphis Cops Dragged Their Feet On Investigating Ja Morant’s Altercations

Albert Burneko

Clarence Thomas Has A Billionaire Sponsor And Nobody Can Do Anything About It

A photo of a bunch of people hooting and partying at the MTV Spring Break event in Cancun in 2014.

Podcasts

Drinking Schnapps On Spring Break

Mark Scheifele and Mikael Backlund fight as their teams scrum

The Flames Might Actually Want To Keep Playing

SACRAMENTO, CA - DECEMBER 22: Annoucer Mark Jones and Commentator Kayte Christensen during the game between the Los Angeles Clippers and Sacramento Kings on December 22, 2021 at Golden 1 Center in Sacramento, California. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2021 NBAE (Photo by Rocky Widner/NBAE via Getty Images)

A Guide To Mark Jones’s Food References And Do-It-Yourself Kits

Mark Cuban Is In Loser Mode Showing Texts

Israel Daramola

LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - APRIL 05: Anthony Davis #3 and LeBron James #6 of the Los Angeles Lakers react from the bench during a 125-118 LA Clippers win at Crypto.com Arena on April 05, 2023 in Los Angeles, California. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement.

Getting Old Sucks

Conor McKeon lives in New York. He can be reached at conorjmckeon@gmail.com.