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Albert Burneko
Assignment Editor
Connect
albert.burneko@defector.com
@albertburneko.bsky.social
The Machines
Elon Musk’s Idiot Chatbot Goes Full Boer
237
Comments
Albert Burneko
May 15, 2025
Journalismism
NYT Reporter: It’s Not Corruption Unless The Envelope Says “Bribe” On It
383
Comments
Albert Burneko
May 12, 2025
NYC: Come To Our WNBA Comedy Show On May 16
The WNBA is back in May! Join Defector and your fellow WNBA fans for a night of stand up, games, giveaways, and special guests as we all get amped up for the new WNBA season. (Pals, check your daily newsletter from April 2 for discount code.)
Animals
For Bea
107
Comments
Albert Burneko
May 9, 2025
This Is So Stupid
Allowing For Various Metaphors
218
Comments
Albert Burneko
May 8, 2025
NBA
The Celtics Will Just Keep Doing This Until We Are All Driven Insane
158
Comments
Albert Burneko
May 6, 2025
The Machines
Only Kevin Roose’s Editors Despise Him More Than I Do
213
Comments
Albert Burneko
April 25, 2025
Media Meltdowns
Henry Blodget Invents, Hires, Sexually Harasses, Blogs About Nonexistent AI Subordinate
217
Comments
Albert Burneko
April 22, 2025
Science
At What Point Has One Actually “Been To” Space?
320
Comments
Albert Burneko
April 15, 2025
This Is So Stupid
Tech CEO: Do Not Say To Me That I Was Not Just Assassinated By The Jackal
323
Comments
Albert Burneko
April 2, 2025
Chefector
I Have Been Defeated And Humbled By A Shortage Of Ketchup
170
Comments
Albert Burneko
March 23, 2025
Animals
For Chop
296
Comments
Albert Burneko
March 14, 2025
This Is So Stupid
Not Enough People Are Taking The Wallet Inspector Seriously
188
Comments
Albert Burneko
March 6, 2025
Soccer
Luis Rubiales Found Guilty Of Sexually Assaulting Jenni Hermoso
71
Comments
Albert Burneko
February 20, 2025
Soccer
A German Coach, The Spanish Media, And Google Translate Walk Into A Press Conference
94
Comments
Albert Burneko
January 15, 2025
Soccer
Deadbeat Club Scrambling To Keep Players It Never Should Have Acquired [Update]
103
Comments
Albert Burneko
December 27, 2024
This Is So Stupid
I Would Not Take My Post-Assassination Meal At An Altoona McDonald’s, But I Guess I’m Built Different
600
Comments
Albert Burneko
December 9, 2024
Journalismism
Can Someone Please Write Normally About This Fascinating Woman?
375
Comments
Albert Burneko
November 20, 2024
Media Meltdowns
What The Fuck Is A “Vaccine Skeptic”?
682
Comments
Albert Burneko
November 15, 2024
Elder Wisdom
Bring Back Weird Halloween Candies
379
Comments
Albert Burneko
November 1, 2024
English Premier League
More Like Erik Done Hag
69
Comments
Albert Burneko
October 28, 2024
NBA
Victor Wembanyama’s Hands Missed Opening Night
77
Comments
Albert Burneko
October 25, 2024
NBA
A Preview Of The 2024-25 NBA Season, Accurately Enumerating Everything That Will Happen In It
247
Comments
Albert Burneko
,
Chris Thompson
,
Giri Nathan
,
Luis Paez-Pumar
,
Patrick Redford
,
Ray Ratto
, and
Tom Ley
October 23, 2024
Elder Wisdom
Point/Counterpoint: Friday Night Playoff Games
175
Comments
Barry Petchesky
and
Albert Burneko
October 18, 2024
Elder Wisdom
When The Toilet Rings, You Must Answer The Call
133
Comments
Albert Burneko
September 24, 2024
Science
Neither Elon Musk Nor Anybody Else Will Ever Colonize Mars
566
Comments
Albert Burneko
September 11, 2024
Older
