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Jamboroo

Hire Me To Be An Anonymous Scout, You Cowards

Scout Brain is real, pervasive, and inescapable.

And I want in on it.

INDIANAPOLIS, IN - FEBRUARY 28: Scouts look on as a player runs the 40-yard dash during the 2012 NFL Combine at Lucas Oil Stadium on February 28, 2012 in Indianapolis, Indiana. (Photo by Joe Robbins/Getty Images)

Is God Conscious?

The majestic spiral galaxy NGC 4414 as photographed by the Hubble Space Telescope. (Photo by NASA)

Life Is Measured In Super Bowls

TAMPA, FLORIDA - JANUARY 31: An aerial view of Raymond James Stadium ahead of Super Bowl LV on January 31, 2021 in Tampa, Florida. (Photo by Mike Ehrmann/Getty Images)

“I Was Down $3,000 And Felt A Fart Coming On.” YOUR SUPER BOWL POOPOROO!

Ego Works

NEW ORLEANS, LOUISIANA - JANUARY 17: Tom Brady #12 of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers celebrates a first down against the New Orleans Saints late in the fourth quarter in the NFC Divisional Playoff game at Mercedes Benz Superdome on January 17, 2021 in New Orleans, Louisiana. (Photo by Chris Graythen/Getty Images)

I Can’t Believe I’m Saying This, But NFL Coaches Are Better Than Ever

ORCHARD PARK, NEW YORK - DECEMBER 13: Head coach Mike Tomlin of the Pittsburgh Steelers looks on before the game against the Buffalo Bills at Bills Stadium on December 13, 2020 in Orchard Park, New York. (Photo by Bryan M. Bennett/Getty Images)

You Truly Are What Your Record Says You Are

DETROIT, MI - JANUARY 03: Kirk Cousins #8 of the Minnesota Vikings looks on in the first quarter of the game against the Detroit Lions at Ford Field on January 3, 2021 in Detroit, Michigan. (Photo by Rey Del Rio/Getty Images)

The Internet Can Belong To You Again

Is Mike Pence Packin’?

Ashley Feinberg

US Vice President Mike Pence delivers an update on "Operation Warp Speed" in the Rose Garden of the White House in Washington, DC on November 13, 2020. (Photo by MANDEL NGAN / AFP) (Photo by

The Old Guard Of Quarterbacks Needs To Go Away

ORCHARD PARK, NEW YORK - DECEMBER 13: Ben Roethlisberger #7 of the Pittsburgh Steelers enters the field before the game against the Buffalo Bills at Bills Stadium on December 13, 2020 in Orchard Park, New York. (Photo by Bryan M. Bennett/Getty Images)

Let’s Break Down Yale Football’s Hilariously Shitty Hype Video

NEW HAVEN, CT - NOVEMBER 18: Deonte Henson #21 of the Yale Bulldogs is congratulated by teammates after making an interception in teh fourth quarter of a game against the Harvard Crimson at the Yale Bowl on November 18, 2017 in New Haven, Connecticut. (Photo by Adam Glanzman/Getty Images)

A Requiem For Matthew Stafford

DETROIT, MICHIGAN - NOVEMBER 26: Matthew Stafford #9 of the Detroit Lions leaves the field following a game against the Houston Texans at Ford Field on November 26, 2020 in Detroit, Michigan. (Photo by Nic Antaya/Getty Images)

I Am Fucking PUMPED For The Holidays At Home

<> on November 24, 2016 in Stamford, Connecticut.

What It’s Like To Feel Strong

LAS VEGAS, NEVADA - JUNE 17: Linebacker Kyle Wilber (L) and safety Erik Harris of the Las Vegas Raiders work out in a park on June 17, 2020 in Las Vegas, Nevada. Training camp for all NFL teams is scheduled to start on July 28, depending on complications from the coronavirus pandemic. The Raiders plan on hosting their camp in the team's Headquarters/Intermountain Healthcare Performance Center that is nearing completion in Henderson, Nevada, this summer, instead of in Napa, California, amid the continuing spread of COVID-19. (Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images)

Pass Blocking Sucks

DAVIE, FLORIDA - JANUARY 30: Stefen Wisniewski #61 of the Kansas City Chiefs performs lineman drills during the Kansas City Chiefs practice prior to Super Bowl LIV at Baptist Health Training Facility at Nova Southern University on January 30, 2020 in Davie, Florida. (Photo by Mark Brown/Getty Images)

My Son Is A Football Player And Hates It

CHESTER, PA - SEPTEMBER 16: Children play flag football before the Aviva Premiership match between the Newcastle Falcons and the Saracens at Talen Energy Stadium on September 16, 2017 in Chester, Pennsylvania. (Photo by Patrick Smith/Getty Images)

It Shouldn’t Have To End This Way For Cam

FOXBOROUGH, MASSACHUSETTS - OCTOBER 25:Cam Newton #1 of the New England Patriots looks on from the bench during the game against the San Francisco 49ers at Gillette Stadium on October 25, 2020 in Foxborough, Massachusetts. (Photo by Maddie Meyer/Getty Images)

In Defense Of Corniness

26 Jan 1997: A "Cheesehead" Green Bay Packers fan cheers his team on during the Green Bay Packers versus the New England Patriots in Super Bowl XXXI at the Louisiana Superdome in New Orleans, Louisiana. The Packers defeated the Patriots 35-21. Mandatory

I Can’t Stop Doing Old-Man Pushups

Let’s All Take A Nap Together

Soldiers of the Canadian Mounted Rifles Regiment taking a nap following military maneuvers during World War One, circa 1914-1918. (Press Illustrating Service/FPG/Archive Photos/Getty Images)

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