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Defector

<p>Columnist. Author of many <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Drew-Magary/e/B001JS8R52/ref=dp_byline_cont_pop_book_1">fine works of literature</a>, including <em>Point B</em>. Handsomest man in the world.</p>


Drew Magary

Dadfector

Why Your Children’s Toy Sucks: Playhut

General manager Kwesi Adofo-Mensah (L) and Head coach Kevin O'Connell of the Minnesota Vikings address the media at TCO Performance Center on February 17, 2022 in Eagan, Minnesota.

Hear Me Out: The Vikings Are USING Aaron Rodgers

Head coach Mike Tomlin of the Pittsburgh Steelers looks on before a game against the Cincinnati Bengals at Acrisure Stadium on January 04, 2025 in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

The Steelers Are Trapped In A Hell Of Their Own Neglect

Orson Welles And Paola Mori Having Lunch At Table

Funbag

The Only Spaghetti Eating Lesson You’ll Ever Need

A special blend of holiday Butter Beer is served up in the Wizarding World of Harry Potter Friday, November 26, 2021. Universal Studios Hollywood celebrates the season with the return of holiday favorites including the Christmas Wizarding World of Harry Potter, Grinchmas and a park loaded with holiday lights, treats and special events through January 9, 2022.

Food

Butterbeer Flavoring Has Broken Contain

New York Jets quarterback Aaron Rodgers (8) talks with former teammate Minnesota Vikings running back Aaron Jones (33) after the professional NFL football game between the New York Jets and Minnesota Vikings on October 6, 2024 at Tottenham Hotspur Stadium in London, England.

I Am Asking Aaron Rodgers, Once And For All, To Leave My Team The Fuck Alone

Arts And Culture

Gun Assembly Required

Lessons From A B-Minus Dog Owner

Aaron Rodgers #8 of the New York Jets reacts after throwing an interception against the Miami Dolphins during the first quarter at MetLife Stadium on January 05, 2025 in East Rutherford, New Jersey.

Report: Aaron Rodgers “Open” To Possessing God-Like Dominion Over Earth, Sea

Pre rolled joints and gummy infused candy are sold on 4/20 on World Weed Day in Washington Square Park on April 20, 2022 in New York City. Hundreds of people flocked to Washington Square Park where vendors set up tables selling cannabis flowers, as well as other cannabis-infused products. Laws across the U.S. vary by state, but in New York City, it is legal for adults 21 and older to possess up to three ounces of cannabis and up to 24 grams of concentrated cannabis for personal use.

Thank God For Weed Gummies

Sam Darnold #14 of the Minnesota Vikings and NFC throws a pass during the 2025 NFL Pro Bowl Skills Showdown on January 30, 2025 at the UCF Campus in Orlando, Florida.

Seahawks Replace Former Jets Punchline With Former Jets Punchline

Geno Smith #7 of the Seattle Seahawks meets with head coach Pete Carroll in the third quarter against the Las Vegas Raiders at Lumen Field on November 27, 2022 in Seattle, Washington.

Tom Brady’s Vision For The 2025 Raiders Looks An Awful Lot Like The 2023 Seahawks

Gene Hackman and Denzel Washington being held at gun point in the control room in a scene from the film 'Crimson Tide', 1995.

A Small Gene Hackman Memory for You

General manager James Gladstone of the Jacksonville Jaguars speaks to the media during the NFL Scouting Combine at the Indiana Convention Center on February 25, 2025 in Indianapolis, Indiana.

New Jaguars GM Talks How He Looks

d coach and FOX NFL Sunday Analyst Jimmy Johnson speaks to the media during FOX Sports Media Day at Ernest N. Morial Convention Center on February 06, 2025 in New Orleans, Louisiana.

Jimmy Johnson Retires From Retirement

Burger and fries with a plate of ketchup.

You Can’t Arrest Me For Drowning My Burger In Ketchup

Primanti Bros.: The Defector Review

Let’s Remember Some Toys

ANKARA, TURKIYE - FEBRUARY 09: A Stanley thermos is seen in Ankara, Turkiye on February 9, 2025.

Is It OK For Me To Drink Out Of A Cup I Once Pissed In?

Jamboroo

The Art Of Chilling

Let’s Remember Some Movie Characters Saying, “Fuck!”

Jordan Davis #90 and Jalen Carter #98 of the Philadelphia Eagles react against the Dallas Cowboys at Lincoln Financial Field on December 29, 2024 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

Win The Draft And You Can Beat Everyone’s Ass

Whilte House Chef Rene Verdon (L) and former chef Jacques Pepin preparing a salad for a picnic on Gardiners Island. (Photo by Mark Kauffman/Getty Images)

I Want To Focus On My Salad

Protestors gather outside of USAID headquarters on February 03, 2025 in Washington, DC. Elon Musk, tech billionaire and head of the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE), said in a social media post that he and U.S. President Donald Trump will shut down the foreign assistance agency.

Help! I’m Worried The Government Will Stiff Me On My Paycheck!

Members of the far-right militia group, Patriot Front, participate in the 2025 March for Life in Washington D.C., Friday, Jan. 24, 2025.