Skip to Content
Menu
Subscribe
Log In
Sports
Arts and Culture
Politics
All
Search
Search
Defector Twitch
Defector Bluesky
Log In
Subscribe
SPORTS
NFL
NBA
WNBA
MLB
NHL
Soccer
Tennis
CULTURE
Podcasts
Arts And Culture
Politics
Movies
Television
Crosswords
OTHER
About Us
Send Us A Tip (News)
Send Us a Tip ($)
Merch Shop
How To Pitch Defector
Freelancer Policies
Crossword Submission Guidelines
Books By Defectors
Defector Hall of Fame
Masthead
How To Comment On Defector
RSS Feed
Terms of Use
Search
Search
Defector Twitch
Defector Bluesky
Log In
Subscribe
Subscribe to skip ads
Advertisement
mailbag
Funbag
I Demand We Normalize Chewing With Your Mouth Open
By
Drew Magary
July 21, 2026
686
Comments
Funbag
I Crave The Ocean
By
Drew Magary
July 14, 2026
744
Comments
Funbag
I Am Captain Of The Democrats Now. Here Is My Battleplan.
By
Drew Magary
May 26, 2026
632
Comments
Funbag
How To Eat A Pop-Tart Correctly
By
Drew Magary
May 19, 2026
493
Comments
Funbag
Fuck Touchscreens
By
Drew Magary
May 12, 2026
655
Comments
Funbag
The Musical Biopic Is Dead
By
Drew Magary
May 5, 2026
680
Comments
Funbag
A Game Of ‘Clue’ Turns Into Open Warfare
By
Drew Magary
April 21, 2026
553
Comments
Funbag
How Many People Would It Take To Storm Mar-A-Lago?
By
Drew Magary
April 14, 2026
449
Comments
Funbag
I Wanna Be A Cowboy
By
Drew Magary
April 7, 2026
483
Comments
Funbag
What’s The Riskiest Thing You’ve Survived Eating?
By
Dave McKenna
March 31, 2026
389
Comments
Funbag
I Can’t Stop Reading Music History Books
By
Drew Magary
March 17, 2026
531
Comments
Funbag
I Burp My House Now
By
Drew Magary
March 3, 2026
595
Comments
Funbag
How Do I Be Nice To A Jesus Freak?
By
Drew Magary
February 17, 2026
709
Comments
Funbag
The NFL Doesn’t Have To Pretend It’s Not An Old Boys’ Club Anymore
By
Drew Magary
February 3, 2026
565
Comments
Funbag
Who Wants To Be A Hero?
By
Drew Magary
January 20, 2026
630
Comments
Funbag
A Belated Review Of ‘Stranger Things’ Season 5 (Which Sucked A Fat One)
By
Drew Magary
January 13, 2026
547
Comments
Funbag
Can I Use Salsa As A Salad Dressing?
By
Drew Magary
January 6, 2026
708
Comments
Funbag
Advertisers Mustn’t Besmirch The Sacred Seasonal Shopping Demon
By
Albert Burneko
December 23, 2025
457
Comments
Funbag
Push Notifications Were Made To Imprison You
By
Drew Magary
December 16, 2025
566
Comments
Funbag
All Of The Brands Suck At Branding
By
Drew Magary
November 25, 2025
634
Comments
Funbag
Which Fictional Character Would You Hate To See Go MAGA?
By
Drew Magary
November 18, 2025
1073
Comments
Funbag
Big Words Are Big Fun
By
Drew Magary
November 11, 2025
538
Comments
Funbag
Am I A Shitty Person For Using AI At Work?
By
Drew Magary
November 4, 2025
523
Comments
Funbag
‘The Postmortal,’ 90,000 Copies Later
By
Drew Magary
October 21, 2025
391
Comments
Funbag
All Teams Should Be Ranked
By
Drew Magary
October 14, 2025
636
Comments
Older
Jump to
January
February
March
April
May
June
July
August
September
October
November
December
Year
2026
2025
2024
2023
2022
2021
Go