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<p>Columnist. Author of many <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Drew-Magary/e/B001JS8R52/ref=dp_byline_cont_pop_book_1">fine works of literature</a>, including <em>Point B</em>. Handsomest man in the world.</p>


Drew Magary

CLEVELAND - 1987: Defensive backs Hanford Dixon #29 and Frank Minnifield #31 of the Cleveland Browns draw plays in the dirt on the field before a game at Municipal Stadium circa 1987 in Cleveland, Ohio. (Photo by George Gojkovich/Getty Images)

A Well-Executed Day

CHICAGO, ILLINOIS - AUGUST 13: Head coach Andy Reid and Patrick Mahomes #15 of the Kansas City Chiefs talk prior to a preseason game against the Chicago Bears at Soldier Field on August 13, 2022 in Chicago, Illinois. (Photo by Michael Reaves/Getty Images)

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Kansas City Chiefs

SEATTLE, WASHINGTON - DECEMBER 15: Brock Purdy #13 of the San Francisco 49ers reacts after beating the Seattle Seahawks 21-13 at Lumen Field on December 15, 2022 in Seattle, Washington. (Photo by Steph Chambers/Getty Images)

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: San Francisco 49ers

Lamar Jackson #8 of the Baltimore Ravens looks on from the sideline during the national anthem prior to the AFC Championship NFL football game against the Kansas City Chiefs at M&amp;T Bank Stadium on January 28, 2024 in Baltimore, Maryland.

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Baltimore Ravens

Barry Petchesky

Show Us Your Fantasy Football Team

<div dir="ltr">
<div>Victoria Zeller is a trans writer born and raised in Buffalo, New York, where she still proudly resides. Her debut novel, <i><a href="https://bookshop.org/p/books/one-of-the-boys-victoria-zeller/21775251" target="_blank" rel="noopener" data-saferedirecturl="https://www.google.com/url?q=https://bookshop.org/p/books/one-of-the-boys-victoria-zeller/21775251&amp;source=gmail&amp;ust=1735306610555000&amp;usg=AOvVaw0sXpgNMmxpIwmIZOFd-Pnw">One of the Boys</a></i>, is out now. Her personal website can be found <a href="http://victoria.monster/" target="_blank" rel="noopener" data-saferedirecturl="https://www.google.com/url?q=http://victoria.monster&amp;source=gmail&amp;ust=1735306610555000&amp;usg=AOvVaw0PrZ7PkO1IykxAodWoMLI_">here</a>.</div>
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Victoria Zeller

Josh Allen #17 of the Buffalo Bills warms up prior to a preseason game against the Chicago Bears at Highmark Stadium on August 10, 2024 in Orchard Park, New York. The Bears won 33-6.

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Buffalo Bills

HOUSTON, TEXAS - AUGUST 24: Cal McNair of the Houston Texans walks off the field during a preseason game against the Los Angeles Rams at NRG Stadium on August 24, 2024 in Houston, Texas. (Photo by Ric Tapia/Getty Images)

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Houston Texans

<p>Staff Writer</p>
<p>Find me on Signal @DefectorChris.19</p>


Chris Thompson

DraftKings Sued By NFL Players Association Over Reignmakers Rug-Pull

Tom Ley

Baker Mayfield #6 of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers looks to pass in the first half during a preseason game against the Miami Dolphins at Raymond James Stadium on August 23, 2024 in Tampa, Florida.

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Tampa Bay Buccaneers

Patrick Redford

DETROIT,MI - APRIL 25: Wide receiver Marvin Harrison Jr. poses for portraits with his father, and former Indianapolis Colts wide receiver Marvin Harrison after being selected fourth overall in the first round by the Arizona Cardinals during the 2024 NFL draft on April 25, 2024 in Detroit Michigan. (Photo by Todd Rosenberg/Getty Images)

Fanatics Refiles, Adds New Marvin Harrison To Marvin Harrison Lawsuit

GREEN BAY, WISCONSIN - JANUARY 07: Green Bay Packers fan looks on during the game against the Chicago Bears at Lambeau Field on January 07, 2024 in Green Bay, Wisconsin. (Photo by John Fisher/Getty Images)

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Green Bay Packers

INGLEWOOD, CA - SEPTEMBER 19: Cowboys head coach Mike McCarthy and Cowboys owner Jerry Jones talk on the field during an NFL game between the Dallas Cowboys and the Los Angeles Chargers on September 19, 2021, at SoFi Stadium in Inglewood, CA. (Photo by Chris Williams/Icon Sportswire)

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Dallas Cowboys

CLEVELAND, OHIO - DECEMBER 17: Fans look on prior to a game between the Chicago Bears and the Cleveland Browns at Cleveland Browns Stadium on December 17, 2023 in Cleveland, Ohio. (Photo by Jason Miller/Getty Images)

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Cleveland Browns

<p>Alex Shultz is a journalist based in Brooklyn. He&#8217;s a writer for <a href="https://www.hardresetmedia.com/" target="_blank" rel="noopener" data-saferedirecturl="https://www.google.com/url?q=https://www.hardresetmedia.com/&amp;source=gmail&amp;ust=1763581679564000&amp;usg=AOvVaw07bi0TNndgTXDN2QH72s3J">Hard Reset,</a> a newsletter about tech, labor, and power.</p>


Alex Shultz

The lobby of the Javits Center during Fanatics Fest

Capital

Three Days At Fanatics Fest, Michael Rubin’s Hollow Monument To Sports And Culture

TAMPA, FLORIDA - JANUARY 15: Head coach Nick Sirianni of the Philadelphia Eagles looks on prior to the NFC Wild Card Playoffs against the Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Raymond James Stadium on January 15, 2024 in Tampa, Florida. (Photo by Julio Aguilar/Getty Images)

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Philadelphia Eagles

Ray Ratto

Caleb Williams #18 of the Chicago Bears warms up prior to an NFL football game against the Cincinnati Bengals at Solider Field on August 17, 2024 in Chicago, Illinois.

Caleb Williams Has More Than Defenses And Doubters To Worry About

Miami Dolphins head coach Mike McDaniel enters the field prior to a preseason game against the Washington Commanders at Hard Rock Stadium on August 17, 2024 in Miami Gardens, Florida. (Photo by Rich Storry/Getty Images)

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Miami Dolphins

Russell Wilson #3 of the Pittsburgh Steelers throws an incomplete pass as he is taken to the ground by Greg Rousseau #50 of the Buffalo Bills in the first quarter during the preseason game at Acrisure Stadium on August 17, 2024 in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Pittsburgh Steelers

Caleb Williams #18 of the Chicago Bears passes in the first half of a preseason game against the Cincinnati Bengals at Soldier Field on August 17, 2024 in Chicago, Illinois.

Caleb Williams Made Some Throws

Cooper Kupp #10 of the Los Angeles Rams walks off the field during a joint practice against the Dallas Cowboys at River Ridge Playing Fields on August 14, 2024 in Oxnard, California.

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Los Angeles Rams

Sarah York

Cincinnati Bengals quarterback Joe Burrow (9) looks toward the sideline during the preseason game against the against the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and the Cincinnati Bengals on August 10, 2024, at Paycor Stadium in Cincinnati, OH.

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Cincinnati Bengals

Tampa Bay Buccaneers Linebacker Lavonte David (54) eyes Jacksonville Jaguars Quarterback Trevor Lawrence (16) and then David wraps up Lawrence for the sack during the regular season game between the Jacksonville Jaguars and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers on December 24, 2023 at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa, Florida.

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Jacksonville Jaguars

Rohan Nadkarni

Head coach Mike Macdonald of the Seattle Seahawks watches a workout during Seattle Seahawks rookie minicamp at Virginia Mason Athletic Center on May 03, 2024 in Renton, Washington.

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Seattle Seahawks

TAMPA, FLORIDA - SEPTEMBER 25: Haason Reddick #7 of the Philadelphia Eagles warms up prior to a game against the Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Raymond James Stadium on September 25, 2023 in Tampa, Florida. (Photo by Julio Aguilar/Getty Images)

Jets’ Quarterback Dysfunction Temporarily Overshadowed By Pass-Rusher Dysfunction

Indianapolis Colts Quarterback Anthony Richardson (5) looks on during the NFL Preseason game between the Denver Broncos and the Indianapolis Colts on August 11, 2024, at Lucas Oil Stadium in Indianapolis, Indiana.

NFL