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Albert Burneko
Assignment Editor
Connect
albert.burneko@defector.com
@albertburneko
Soccer
Nigeria Could Be Headed For World Cup Disaster
40
Comments
Albert Burneko
June 29, 2023
Chefector
You Just Need A Thermometer
201
Comments
Albert Burneko
June 10, 2023
The Defector Crewneck Sweatshirt Is Back In Stock
Bad news: It's getting colder. Good news: The best way to cover your forearms has returned. The critically acclaimed Defector crewneck sweatshirt has been restocked in all sizes. Now's the time to get one of our most popular items, printed with union labor in the USA.
MLS
Lionel Messi Chooses Inter Miami
219
Comments
Albert Burneko
June 7, 2023
La Liga
Barcelona’s Pursuit Of Lionel Messi Is A Degrading Farce
147
Comments
Albert Burneko
June 6, 2023
Horse Racing
Horse Racing To Hide Somewhere Else Until Storm Blows Over
100
Comments
Albert Burneko
June 4, 2023
MLB
Extremely Depressing Report: Stephen Strasburg’s Body Is A Wreck
206
Comments
Albert Burneko
June 4, 2023
NBA
A Timely And Data-Loaded 2023 NBA Finals Preview, For Basketball Idiots
71
Comments
Albert Burneko
June 1, 2023
NBA
The Heat Win Ugly
346
Comments
Albert Burneko
May 30, 2023
Chefector
Your Crummy Apartment Stove Is Perfectly Fine For Cooking
202
Comments
Albert Burneko
May 29, 2023
La Liga
La Liga’s Racism Problem Boils Over
137
Comments
Albert Burneko
May 22, 2023
Media Meltdowns
How Not To Interview A Transportation Secretary
400
Comments
Albert Burneko
May 19, 2023
NBA
Happy Recrimination Season To All Who Celebrate
174
Comments
Albert Burneko
May 16, 2023
Chefector
Pink Lemonade For Everybody!
205
Comments
Albert Burneko
May 13, 2023
Media Meltdowns
Everyone Who Knows What Elizabeth Holmes Did Wrong, Step Forward (Not So Fast, The New York Times)
368
Comments
Albert Burneko
May 8, 2023
Capital
Jordan Neely Just Needed Some Help
352
Comments
Albert Burneko
May 3, 2023
NBA
Well, Shit: Steph Curry’s Fourth-Quarter Buckets, Graded For Rudeness
172
Comments
Albert Burneko
May 1, 2023
Chefector
How To Help Your Kids Learn To Like A Food
315
Comments
Albert Burneko
April 29, 2023
NBA
Giannis Erupts On Reporter With Heated Display Of Nuanced Understanding Of The Ultimate Purpose Of Sport
199
Comments
Albert Burneko
April 27, 2023
NBA
The Knicks Spent A Quarter In Hell
80
Comments
Albert Burneko
April 19, 2023
Chefector
Uncleanliness Is Next To Godliness
339
Comments
Albert Burneko
April 18, 2023
La Liga
Barcelona’s Doing Its Damnedest To Make Winning Boring
29
Comments
Albert Burneko
April 17, 2023
NBA
A Timely Preview Of The 2023 NBA Playoffs, Almost Certainly Including All Of The Participants
146
Comments
Albert Burneko
April 14, 2023
Politics
Clarence Thomas Has A Billionaire Sponsor And Nobody Can Do Anything About It
564
Comments
Albert Burneko
April 6, 2023
This Is So Stupid
It’s Too Easy To Steal Bases!
284
Comments
Albert Burneko
April 3, 2023
MLB
Los Angeles Angel Of Anaheim Does Amazing Baseball Thing, For Naught
171
Comments
Albert Burneko
March 31, 2023
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