Some people are fans of the Indianapolis. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Indianapolis Colts. This 2025 Defector NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here.
Your team: Indianapolis Colts, like it says in the intro.
Your 2024 record: 8–9, just like the Dolphins, Cardinals and Falcons, just to name three other teams that barely cast a shadow. I mean, at least the Colts won a title in the last two decades, which is more than can be said for the Dolphins (1973), Cardinals (1947) and Falcons (hah!). None of that has anything to do with where the Colts were last year, let alone where they are now, but 8–9 is the kind of record that says everything about nothing, just as the 2023 season's 9-8 record said exactly the same thing.
These Colts, though, briefly suggested a level of unwarranted hope by winning four out of seven games early. Only a strength of schedule pedant would mention that those wins came against the Bears, Steelers, Titans and Dolphins by a total of 17 points. There were concerns about QB Anthony Richardson which turned out to be more prescient than pissy, though, and as the season went on those concerns became Joe Flacco. Indeed, Richardson's difficulty finding other humans to catch the balls he threw became as much of a running narrative as the "I got tired" memes against Houston. He not only threw more interceptions than touchdowns (12–8, if you're scoring at home) and finished dead last in passer rating, but completed only 47.7 percent of his passes, the lowest number by a quarterback with more than half his team's starts since Tim Tebow in 2011. Yeah, I'd be tired, too. How he managed to finish 25th in Comeback Player of the Year voting is what they call a perfect ponder.
But we'll get back to that in a moment, because you're already wondering how they ended up winning eight games, and the answer to that is RB Jonathan Taylor. He was the one exemplary island in this sea of meh, finishing fourth in rushing yards and doing what he could to allow the Colts to have the ball at all, which they did less often than every team but Carolina and Jacksonville. They were on balance a team that could befuddle you if you could be bothered to give them the time and attention for fuddlement of any kind. If people weren't riveted by the Richardson saga, they would have been a 17-week bye for all the notice they got.
Some of this is the essential gravitational pull of the division they're in, the AFC South. Indianapolis does not belong there based on the geography, but the results since Peyton Manning left are a none-too-stirring 113-114-1, and 48-51-1 since Andrew Luck decided he liked his brains inside his head. They have been looking for a quarterback ever since, flitting from Jacoby Brissett to Philip Rivers to Carson Wentz to Matt Ryan to Gardner Minshew to Richardson/Flacco since Luck's retirement, and they're still not sure what they want to do about this year. But we'll get to that in a second. 2024 was basically another proud year of non-achievement, the 14th pick in the draft, and a quarterback (Notre Dame's Riley Leonard in the sixth round) they could send a car to collect.
Your coach: Shane Steichen begins his third season as the chief treader of water, but there is no guarantee that he'll finish it—not because he is necessarily bad at the job (he is by any measure deeply middling like the rest of the franchise down to the uniforms) but because of ownership change. Jim Irsay died in May and left the operation of the team to his three daughters. The eldest, Carlie Irsay-Gordon, becomes the 17th inheritor of an NFL team, proving if nothing else that looking for new blood in the executive suites need only go as far as the suite itself. It is not yet known what she intends to do with Steichen (or general manager Chris Ballard, for that matter) if results remain smack in the middle, but we do know that there is a nearly unlimited supply of young eager coaches who look exactly like Steichen, down to the placemat in his hand and the stern look that neutralizes joy, and can handle an introductory presser with more adeptness than Liam Coen. We must, though, consider the genetic issue, in that her father did hire Jeff Saturday on a furious whim, so anything can happen and sooner rather than later.
Your quarterback: You thought we covered this already, but you know nothing of our work. Plus you're in the dark as much as they seem to be, because they went out and grabbed Daniel Jones off the Not-As-Desirable-As-Tommy-DeVito bin at the friendly price of $14 million for one year. Richardson started the first practice game and swiftly had his pinky finger on his throwing hand dislocated, with reeks of harbinger-hood. Jones is scheduled to start the second preseason game, so we can expect a compound fracture of the right buttock or a pulled eyelid.
If this seems to you like Steichen has no idea what decision will present itself to him, you may be overthinking it. Steichen has a definite lean, and it is for Richardson, under-fingered though he might be, but it's not so much of a lean that Jones can't win the job and become the team's seventh official opening day starter in as many years. This will cause Giants fans a hearty laugh, and Christ knows they could use one with the steaming mess they get to watch, but it could also be that Jones was dragged by his surroundings as much as they by him. Either way, Leonard is only a panicked wave from Steichen away from winning the job from both of them because who doesn't like a scrumptious local story, even if it was born in Alaska and went to Duke first.
What's new that sucks: Here's a conundrum because the newest stuff has been brought in to replace or enhance stuff that already sucked, and therefore might not suck as much. CIG being the new owner-in-place is very new in ways that will affect the operation for years, or at least until she figures that all she really need to do is hire well, sign checks, and cash more checks. As is true for all owners, if she turns up in the draft room for anything other than snacks on the way out, it's all gone horribly wrong. Jones is new and has sucked in the past, so that's something, and the secondary, which ranked 30th in completion percentage allowed and helped get defensive coordinator Gus Bradley fired a year ago, has lost CB Jaylon Jones to a hamstring-related ouchie that could punch a hole in their newly constructed pass defense.
But the Colts haven't done "new" well since they drafted Luck, and the problem isn't "new" as much as "same." They signed LT Bernhard Raimann to a four-year deal worth $100 million give or take the usual $70 million, which is new and not sucky, but it could end up being sucky if he misses a single assignment and gets his quarterback mauled. You like the contractual effort, but you learn to be wary. They also like first-round pick Tyler Warren, a tight end from Penn State's tight end/linebacker breeding zoo, who could ease the quarterbacks' weekly burden of finding WR Adonai Mitchell at 15 yards.
But those are at the fringes, and at their heart the Colts remain the Colts. Unlike the Titans, who were awful and are fighting about their uniforms with the Texans, and the Jaguars back in their five-win stasis after brief flirtations with the sunny side of .500, the Colts are as solid and stolid as the rest of Indiana, which doesn't get them any closer to the postseason. Maybe they can get Tyrese Haliburton to inspire them with emotional tales of how the Pacers became the state's leading bad-asses. Just don't look at his crutches.
What has always sucked: Everything that isn't Taylor, give or take 10 percent. Jim Irsay kind of sucked—even if his heart was often in the right place, his head often wasn't, and l'affaire Saturday will mark this team until Steichen squeezes an 11-win season out of these guys, because if he doesn't he will be known as the guy who replaced Saturday and nothing else.
What might not suck: Taylor, bien sûr. But also, their place in the division, which is still the most winnable division in sports since the NHL expanded from six teams to 12 and put all the expansion teams in the same division. That was in 1967, when Johnny Unitas was still alive, the team was still in Baltimore, and Diner was the movie that explained it all. If you like history, the Colts are the team for you. Otherwise, drive on, citizens. Nothing to see here.
HEAR IT FROM COLTS FANS, WHO ARE REALLY JUST IMPATIENT PACERS AND HOOSIERS FANS KILLING TIME UNTIL WINTER!
Tyler:
Jim Irsay was a pill-popping nepo grandpa whose favorite genre of music was "could be used as the soundtrack to a Cialis commercial"... and something tells me he's the best we're ever gonna get. Ah well. At least his band was better than James Dolan's.
Brad:
Daniel Jones? You expect me to write something acerbically witty about Daniel Jones? Yes, I could be more creative, but also consider: it’s Daniel Jones. Couldn’t think of a more perfectly anodyne pairing between franchise and maybe-starting quarterback.
Now Irsay’s kids that are running the show? They have a chance to turn a future Hard Knocks into an Emmy-winning season of prestige TV.
Seth and Eric:
It's easy to see why Chris Ballard is still employed as the Colts GM. He successfully built a juggernaut in Indy, going 30-38 the last 4 seasons. Ballard unfortunately lost Andrew Luck to an early retirement right before that epic run. This was not Ballard's fault. What is Ballard's fault is what happened since then: Jacoby Brisset, Brian Hoyer, Philip Rivers, Carson Wentz, Matt Ryan, Sam Ehlinger, Nick Foles, Gardner Minshew, Anthony Richardson, Joe Flacco, Daniel Jones...
Peter:
When my WYTS submission last year didn't see print I understood why, much like the Colts it was a bunch of underperforming jokes.
Chris:
So had a date with the mother-in-law of a Colt. Super cute, easy to talk to, completely out of my league. In spite of the last, it's going pretty well until she uncorks, "So Trump's doing a really great job!" And it was pretty much straight downhill from there. One & Done, which coincidentally is my prediction for the Colts' playoff record this season.
Kevin:
The team has been middling to bad ever since we ran our franchise QB into the ground, but there's genuinely no hope going into this season. Richardson is a bust, no way around it. Daniel Jones' ceiling evokes the 7 1/2 floor from Being John Malkovich. Every win provides cover for Chris Ballard's ignominious tenure. With any luck, there won't be too many of those this season.
Matt:
The Pacers gave me reason to believe only to have an Achilles tendon disintegrate and bury that belief underneath Chet Holmgrens pre-pubescent beard.
So now I turn to football and my begrudging fandom based on proximity to Indy and memories of Peyton Manning. And what do I find waiting for me?
Daniel Jones.
I hope the ghost of Jim Irsay haunts Ryan Grigson for the rest of his life.
Rich:
Jim Irsay has finally gone to the big opioid cloud in the sky. While this could be a cause for celebration since a billionaire is dead, his 3 fail-daughters who inherited the team will likely end up becoming the King Ghidorah meme but all the heads are stupid, and that dampens the mood a little.
On the field, choosing between Anthony Richardson and Daniel Jones is equivalent to choosing to gouge your eyes out with a fork or a spoon. Both methods are painful, not very effective and you still end up with the same result. Naturally, the fanbase is having grand delusions of Danny Dimes becoming the next Sam Darnold and we're back to the fork and spoon dilemma again. However, the preseason atonement of Daniel Jones as the savior, while running Anthony Richardson out of town with pitchforks is on brand for Indiana's views on race.
Chris Ballard is the real life version of the Seahawks GM in that terrible Kevin Costner Draft Day movie.
Jonathan Taylor is two years away from pulling a Saquan and leaving to win a Super Bowl somewhere else.
The last time the Colts won the AFC South was when the Ice Bucket Challenge was a thing.
This franchise had 19 years of Peyton Manning and Andrew Luck and amazingly still managed a sub-.500 playoff record during that time.
Yet despite all of this, when the Colts are wallowing in mediocrity at 6-6 in December once again, I'll end up convincing myself that they'll somehow win the division. And hate myself for doing so when they inevitably fail.
Football is dumb.
Jacob:
There are many things I could say about this team, but I must begin with “who gives a shit?” Not you, barely me, and until about six months ago, not the GM, either. The vibes are so rancid that people think the damn Patriots are going to win more games than this team and they went 9-8 with Gardner Goddamn Minshew two years ago. They lost their divisional games against the Texans by a combined 5 points last season with Anthony Richardson and Joe Flacco! I genuinely would prefer to have a shitty team with good vibes than whatever is going on right now. They’re so much better than it feels and so much worse than you’d think.
One of the biggest problems with this team is that nobody knows who these guys are, because it’s almost entirely composed of Some Dudes. I started collecting sports cards to bond over with my six month old when he starts to notice sports and it occurred to me how few players on this roster I would actually want to tell him about. I think I’m just going to stock up on Lamar Jackson (go Cards) and Kyle Hamilton cards and pretend that I’m a Ravens fan in 5-6 years. Once everyone gets fired next January, I hope Jonathan Taylor, DeForest Buckner, Quinton Nelson, and Kenny Moore go to Baltimore or Buffalo and actually win something. I’ll even take them going to Drew’s Vikings along with 2/3 of our interior O-line. Hell, take Josh Downs on his rookie contract while you’re at it. Not Zaire Franklin, though. He has to stay.
Maybe it’s against the spirit of the exercise but I will allow myself to hope for Laiatu Latu and Tyler Warren to be both good and fun. I firmly believe that every team needs a big goofy hoss at tight end, and the idea that we could see some 1962-ass offense with four guys in the backfield does sound fun and stupid rather than miserable and stupid.
Final note to ruin everyone’s day: signing Daniel Jones specifically was a great idea and I’ll die on that hill of shit. There was no chance the quarterback play would be Actually Good no matter what, so they may as well have another guy who sucks but they don’t have to chuck the playbook out for. See what I’m doing right now? Making excuses for Daniel Jones? I’m already preparing myself for another 8-9 season that somehow doesn’t mathematically end until week 18 but still makes me feel like a Browns fan.
Job:
Oh boy, why the fuck was my first ever NFL game a 2010 Playoffs Peyton Manning masterclass against the Ravens? As a Brazilian visiting NYC for the first time, the chance of watching an American football game live (if the Ravens won, they’d play the Jets in NY) made me sit down and watch this god awful confusing sport for the first time, in the hopes it would come to New York. Looking back, my naivety in assuming tickets would be easy to get and affordable is laudable. Still, I liked the game and I could see there was some genius happening with the Colts and, lo and behold, I made them my team.
What a fucking mistake. This is a dumpster fire organization that lucked into TWO generational talents in sequence and all they got to show is a single Super Bowl win. I wonder if Andrew Luck the architect can still draw straight lines after getting beat to a pulp. The offensive line has always been atrocious. The running game, non-existent. Defense and the Colts don’t belong in the same sentence.
I haven’t really cared about the Colts ever since Luck retired, watching as the quarterback’s revolving door spins around and every year the team places its bets on a washed up has been to try and get to the playoffs in what is, without a doubt, the weakest conference in the league. All the moments of hope, the Week 17 game against any other dumpster fire AFC South team with the season on the line that inevitable end in a 21-17 score for the opposing team, these are all flukes. I doubt I will ever see the Colts be relevant again.
Now that Irsay is dead (and seeing Defector praise him as one of the least awful and fiendish owners was reassuring), I have no idea what will happen to the organization and I don’t really care. I still cherish the team and will proudly wear my Manning jersey to show how much of a REAL OLD SCHOOL FAN I am, as most people here associate Manning with the Broncos and I have never seen another Colts jersey around.
Then come the NBA Playoffs and I became a Pacers fan. I have no idea why the state of Indiana, on which I have never set foot and which looks from a distance to be a cesspool of MAGA adoring white trash, houses the teams I end up falling in love with. Maybe I wish I was a WASP. All I know is I have chosen to be miserable when it comes to American sports.Last time I checked, the coach had a funny name, so there’s that. Anthony Richards is an incompetent crybaby. En route to a 8-9 season with mathematical hopes that we’ll make the playoffs in the last round.
Kevin:
Andrew Luck left and I was sad but hopeful. Brissett gave me a little hope. Rivers gave me anxiety and a little less hope. Wentz took my hope and wadded it into a ball. Ryan made me consider cancelling my NFL Ticket. Drafting Richardson gave me no hope at all and that led to Minshew - again, hope crushed to atoms. Flacco was not Cleveland Flacco (oh, this hurts to type). And it all now leads to Daniel Jones (assuming Richardson does anything QB like). My hope is completely lost and I live in despair. The only excitement the team would have given me this season died with Jim Irsay's Twitter ramblings. I am out (though, I will probably be watching the opener with hope in my heart)! I deserve whatever pain it causes me. I just can't quit them.
Matt:
Daniel. Jones.
I thought Wentz was the bottom.
Wentz was not the bottom.
I hope Jim Irsay has taken up spectral residence in Ryan Grigson’s closet and haunts him until the end of days with never ending renditions of Yellow Submarine.
Maeve:
There is a genuine chance that even if Anthony Richardson has a Josh Allen-style year three turnaround, 30% of the fanbase will start chanting for Riley Leonard every time he throws a pick.
RIP Jim, your antics will be missed.
Nicholas:
Anthony Richardson has the worst pic 6 Deadspin/Defector has ever explicitly shown and the second is Brett Favre's. Daniel Jones' head was machine stamped on his neck. We have 3 women owners, which is great, but they are still tainted spawn of Irsay, and probably have the politics of Amy Comey Barrett. Jonathan Taylor is the 3rd Pro Bowl RB we've wasted, and I'm way more upset about Ty's Achilles. Fuck SGA and calf strains.
Chris:
Time to remember some of the best Irsay moments! My favorite is when he claimed he got pulled over because cops are prejudiced against rich white billionaires.
Bonus points: He was pulled over in Carmel, which has enough old- and new-money smugness that the entire state hates the town. It's impossible to find a city in the state more deferential to wealth than Carmel.
Will:
I woke up early on 25th August 2019, so I could watch the full game replay of the preseason Colts v Bears before work because I’m a loser that follows the NFL from the other side of the globe. Didn’t check the news or social media just turned on Gamepass and watched over 2 hours of Swag Kelly’s patented QB mediocrity. My booze-addled brain got me thinking “this guy ain’t half bad for a third stringer. Thank fuck a bum like this will never start for my team”, and “How blessed am I to support a team blessed with a generational talent like Andrew Luck who’ll be keeping us in contention until the 2030s”. Then I opened up Twitter and…fuuuck. The Colts have been Swagless since that day. We’ll forever be haunted by the ‘Curse of Swag Kelly’ - doomed to watching a never-ending procession of mediocre quarterbacks who can scramble a bit but can’t complete more than 16 passes in a game. And I blame myself for my hubris. Well myself and Ryan Grigson. Fuck that guy.
For the 8th season running, this team’s best player is a fucking guard and even he isn’t as good as he used to be.
The Colts are fading into oblivion faster than a logo on a Fanatics t-shirt.
The inertia around this team has reached the point where even our QB isn’t interested in finishing games. What’s the point? Why bother putting your body on the line just to finish 8-9 or 9-8 and just miss out on the playoffs again.Now old Jimmy boy has popped his clogs, fans have come to realise that he was the only entertaining thing about this team. We’ve not been fun or relevant since Andrew Luck retired.
Irsay was an erratic, pill-popping, drug-driving, rock’n’roll cosplaying, billionaire-sympathy-seeking prick and yet…there goes the best owner this league has ever had. And that says all you need to know about this terrible fucking league.
Colts fans are referred to this year’s QB Training Camp Battle between Daniel Jones and Anthony Richardson as ‘Sophie’s Choice’.
Patrick:
We broke Peyton’s neck and then gave him a $36m Hallmark card, just to watch him fuck off to Denver and never talk to us again. He came back for his ‘statue’ outside of Lucas Oil and instantly flew back to his Papa Johns franchises on his private jet. The most famous band to come out of our city was called ‘The Highlighters’ – which is perfect, because that’s what our cultural resonance amounts to in this country. 99% of our elected officials are card-carrying Nazis, and 2/3rds of our fan base want us to tank the season so we can get Arch Manning, who will keep his $6.8m NIL deal just to never have to set foot inside of the 317. Dominic Rhodes should have been MVP of SBXLI.
Andy:
I haven't yet recovered from the heartbreaking end to the Pacers' Finals run, so it will actually be a blessing to watch the Colts, as no one currently employed by this team has ever inspired feelings of goodwill, optimism, or civic pride. The most fire they showed all year was when they got in a podcast war with Pat McAfee, and somehow made him look reasonable, insightful, and likable by comparison.
Anthony Richardson could take a huge leap in Year 3 and go from being as bad as Curtis Painter to as bad as Daniel Jones.
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