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Ray Ratto

PHILADELPHIA, PA - OCTOBER 03: Miami Marlins general manager Kim Ng looks on prior to Game 1 of the Wild Card Series between the Miami Marlins and the Philadelphia Phillies at Citizens Bank Park on Tuesday, October 3, 2023 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. (Photo by Rob Tringali/MLB Photos via Getty Images)

That’s More Like The Marlins We All Know And Ignore

A Danger sign in front of trees in Yellowstone National Park warns visitors to not approach wildlife.

Into The Woods

Do Not Fuck Around With The Woods

Shedeur Sanders #2 of the Colorado Buffaloes throws a pass against the Stanford Cardinal during the third quarter at Folsom Field on October 13, 2023 in Boulder, Colorado.

College Football

The Pac-12’s Death Throes Make For The Most Entertaining Football In The Country

PHOENIX, AZ - OCTOBER 11: Lourdes Gurriel Jr. #12 of the Arizona Diamondbacks celebrates after winning against the Los Angeles Dodgers during Game 3 of the Division Series at Chase Field on Wednesday, October 11, 2023 in Phoenix, Arizona. The Arizona Diamondbacks won 4-2. (Photo by Chris Coduto/MLB Photos via Getty Images)

100 Wins Doesn’t Buy What It Used To

SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA - OCTOBER 07: Anthony Davis #3 sits on the bench next to LeBron James #23 of the Los Angeles Lakers during their game against the Golden State Warriors at Chase Center on October 07, 2023 in San Francisco, California. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and/or using this photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. (Photo by Ezra Shaw/Getty Images)

Get A Load Of Management’s New Claim About Load Management

TAMPA, FL - MARCH 7: Players from the Tampa Bay Lightning skate during warmups with special hockey tape for Pride Night against the Philadelphia Flyers at Amalie Arena on March 7, 2023 in Tampa, Florida. (Photo by Mark LoMoglio/NHLI via Getty Images)

The NHL Skates Backward

Steve Garvey, in the foreground, at his induction into the Legends of Dodgers Baseball inaugural class back in September of 2018. He's got sunglasses on and is clapping.

Politics

Nobody Wants Senator Steve Garvey

Brock Purdy #13 of the San Francisco 49ers reacts after a touchdown by Christian McCaffrey #23 during the second quarter against the Dallas Cowboys at Levi's Stadium on October 08, 2023 in Santa Clara, California.

Brock Purdy Is Good Enough To Make His Teammates Annoying

Sportscaster Jim Gray, Tampa Bay Buccaneers quarterback Tom Brady and Las Vegas Raiders owner and managing general partner and Las Vegas Aces owner Mark Davis watch players warm up during halftime of a game between the Connecticut Sun and the Aces

Tom Brady’s Minority Ownership Deal Could Use Some Competition

Ketel Marte #4 of the Arizona Diamondbacks celebrates defeating the Milwaukee Brewers in Game Two of the Wild Card Series at American Family Field on October 04, 2023 in Milwaukee, Wisconsin.

The NL’s Underdogs Can Make A Big Mess Of These Playoffs

Evan Neal #73 of the New York Giants looks on following an NFL football game between the Arizona Cardinals and the New York Giants at State Farm Stadium on September 17, 2023 in Glendale, Arizona.

Lion Cowed By Sheep

A general view of Tropicana Field during Game 1 of the Wild Card Series between the Texas Rangers and the Tampa Bay Rays at Tropicana Field on Tuesday, October 3, 2023 in Tampa, Florida.

The Rays Are Masters Of Being Forgotten

PHOENIX, ARIZONA - SEPTEMBER 19: Manager Gabe Kapler #19 of the San Francisco Giants watches from the dugout during the first inning of the MLB game against the Arizona Diamondbacks at Chase Field on September 19, 2023 in Phoenix, Arizona. (Photo by Christian Petersen/Getty Images)

The Giants’ Organizational Mediocrity Runs Deeper Than Gabe Kapler

PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA - SEPTEMBER 21: Bryce Harper #3 of the Philadelphia Phillies reacts during the fifth inning against the New York Mets at Citizens Bank Park on September 21, 2023 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. (Photo by Tim Nwachukwu/Getty Images)

Angel Hernandez Will Make You Want To Throw A Thing

NEW YORK, NEW YORK - SEPTEMBER 28: The Grounds crew pull the tarp back on the field at Citi Field on September 28, 2023 in the Flushing neighborhood of the Queens borough of New York City. (Photo by Elsa/Getty Images)

Fish All Wet

A photo of a brown stationwagon next to the water. It is covered in stickers.

Racing

The Legend Of The Brown Smear In Newfoundland

There’s A Reason The Rockets Think They Can Trade Kevin Porter Jr.

General view of Busch Stadium during a game between the St. Louis Cardinals and the Oakland Athletics on August 14, 2023 in St Louis, Missouri.

Joy Is Where You Find It, Even If That Means In St. Louis

A New York Jets fan looks on from the crowd during a game against the Tampa Bay Buccaneers at MetLife Stadium on Saturday, August 19, 2023, in East Rutherford, New Jersey.

For Jets Fans, Disaster Is The Only Love Language

Adam Silver Thinks The Key To Resting NBA Players Is More Policy, Not Fewer Games

ARLINGTON, TX - SEPTEMBER 5: Manager Bruce Bochy #15 of the Texas Rangers watches action against the Houston Astros during the second inning at Globe Life Field on September 5, 2023 in Arlington, Texas. (Photo by Ron Jenkins/Getty Images)

The Rangers Are Going Quietly

CLEVELAND, OH - SEPTEMBER 04: Cleveland Guardians position player David Fry (12) delivers a pitch to the plate during the sixth inning of the Major League Baseball game between the Minnesota Twins and Cleveland Guardians on September 4, 2023, at Progressive Field in Cleveland, OH. (Photo by Frank Jansky/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images)

Let David Fry Cook

Ronald Acuña Jr. of the Atlanta Braves watches his second-inning grand slam against the Los Angeles Dodgers, which made him the first MLB player in history to hit 30 home runs and steal 60 bases in the same season.

The World Series Is All We Want And Can Never Have

Landen King #14, Jaylon Glover #1, Munir McClain #4, Nate Johnson #13 of the Utah Utes lead the team onto the field before the start o their game agianst the Florida Gators at Rice Eccles Stadium August 31, 2023 in Salt Lake City, Utah.

The Pac-12’s Demise Will Be Rich With Metaphors

Chairman Jerry Reinsdorf of the Chicago White Sox watches his team play against the Cleveland Indians at Guaranteed Rate Field on May 01, 2021 in Chicago, Illinois.