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Ray Ratto

Aaron Rodgers Suspends His Purely Hypothetical Achilles Injury Comeback Tour

Barry Petchesky

EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ - NOVEMBER 24: Aaron Rodgers #8 of the New York Jets looks on from the sideline during the national anthem prior to an NFL football game against the Miami Dolphins at MetLife Stadium on November 24, 2023 in East Rutherford, New Jersey. (Photo by Perry Knotts/Getty Images)

Aaron Rodgers Now Puttering Around Practice Fields Trying To Shock People

Tom Ley

Aaron Rodgers sits on the turf during an NFL football game between the New York Jets and the Buffalo Bills, Monday, Sept. 11, 2023, in East Rutherford, N.J.

Aaron Rodgers Is Broken And The Jets Are Back In The Mud

Staff Writer
Find me on Signal @DefectorChris.19

Chris Thompson

Shohei Ohtani stands in the dugout before game two of a Wednesday doubleheader.

Shohei Ohtani’s Arm Kerploded And The Angels Are In Hell

Jarred Kelenic #10 of the Seattle Mariners looks on before the game against the San Francisco Giants at Oracle Park on July 03, 2023 in San Francisco, California.

Jarred Kelenic Is Really, Really Sorry About Kicking That Water Cooler

Columnist. Author of many <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Drew-Magary/e/B001JS8R52/ref=dp_byline_cont_pop_book_1">fine works of literature</a>, including Point B. Handsomest man in the world.

Drew Magary

Aaron Rodgers #8 of the New York Jets takes his turn during a warm up drill with a medicine ball as teammate Zach Wilson #2 looks on during an offseason workout session at Atlantic Health Jets Training Center on May 23, 2023 in Florham Park, New Jersey.

RodgersWatch: Aaron Rodgers Is Just A Kid In The Body Of An Old Quarterback With A Tweaked Calf

Giri Nathan

Rafael Nadal announces his withdrawal from the French Open

Tennis

Rafael Nadal Will Be Out Of The French Open, And Out Of Tennis After 2024

Zion Williamson looks on from the sidelines

Where Was Zion Williamson, And Where Will He Be?

SALT LAKE CITY, UTAH - FEBRUARY 18: Zion Williamson of the New Orleans Pelicans speaks during media availability as part of 2023 NBA All Star Weekend on February 18, 2023 in Salt Lake City, Utah. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement.

Another Zion Williamson Season Ends In The Toilet

Just Like That, Bianca Andreescu Is Out Again

Lonzo Ball Descends To An Even Lower Circle Of Knee Hell

Kevin Durant’s Home Debut Ends During Warmups

Zion Williamson sits on the bench in street clothes.

Zion Williamson’s Injury Setback Is Everyone’s Loss

Cycling

Big Crash Leaves Cyclist Dangling Over Small Bridge

Lonzo Ball sits on the bench at the Bulls game

One Year Later, Lonzo Ball Is Still In Knee Hell

xx during an NFL divisional round playoff football game between the San Francisco 49ers and the Dallas Cowboys in Santa Clara, Calif., Sunday, Jan. 22, 2023. (Michael Owens via AP)

The Hip Drop Tackle Could Be The NFL’s Next Illegal Tackle

Rafael Nadal Limps Out Of The Australian Open

Lauren Theisen

Players look on during an injury timeout for Russell Gage

Russell Gage Has Neck Injury And Concussion, Feeling In His Extremities

Patrick Redford

PHOENIX, ARIZONA - JANUARY 06: Cameron Payne #15 and Devin Booker #1 of the Phoenix Suns react on the bench during the final moments of the NBA game against the Miami Heat at Footprint Center on January 06, 2023 in Phoenix, Arizona. The Heat defeated the Suns 104-96. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. (Photo by Christian Petersen/Getty Images)

Everything Suddenly Feels Quite Grim In Phoenix

Maitreyi Anantharaman

UConn Huskies guard Paige Bueckers (5) on the sidelines during the women's college basketball game between the Butler Bulldogs and UConn Huskies on January 3, 2023, at Hinkle Fieldhouse in Indianapolis, IN.

College Basketball

UConn Is Too Cursed To Play Basketball Right Now

Samer Kalaf

Buffalo Bills players react after teammate Damar Hamlin #3 was injured against the Cincinnati Bengals during the first quarter at Paycor Stadium on January 02, 2023 in Cincinnati, Ohio.

Bills-Bengals Game Postponed After Safety Damar Hamlin Collapses On Field

Jamboroo

The Birth Of A Scar

CLEVELAND, OH - NOVEMBER 2: Darius Garland #10 of the Cleveland Cavaliers handles the ball against the Boston Celtics on November 2, 2022 at Rocket Mortgage FieldHouse in Cleveland, Ohio. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and/or using this Photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2022 NBAE (Photo by David Liam Kyle/NBAE via Getty Images)

Darius Garland Only Needed One Functional Eye To Torch Boston

Liverpool's Diogo Jota (left) and Chelsea's N'Golo Kante battle for the ball during the Premier League match at Anfield, Liverpool. Picture date: Thursday March 4, 2021. (Photo by Oli Scarff/PA Images via Getty Images)

Soccer

The World Cup Injury Crisis Is Only Going To Get Worse

Medical staff tend to quarterback Tua Tagovailoa #1 of the Miami Dolphins as he is carted off on a stretcherafter an injury during the 2nd quarter of the game against the Cincinnati Bengals at Paycor Stadium on September 29, 2022.