Opening Day is just around the corner, and if you follow the local news, there's a decent chance you've been treated to a sneak peek of your home team's bold innovations in the ballpark concession space. There's the Sluggerrr Dog in Kansas City—"chorizo topped with Manchego, tempura batter, Doritos Cool Ranch crust, and avocado aioli." There's Kyle's Cutlets in Philly—"topped with creamy burrata, crispy fried pepperoni, and arugula, drizzled with a sweet and spicy hot honey sauce on a Liscio’s Bakery roll." There's the H-Town Hot Chicken Loaded Fries in Houston—"crispy fresh cut French fries, fried chicken bites tossed in H-Town Hot Sauce, ranch, hot honey aioli, and green onions." There's the Fried Almond Torte in Pittsburgh—"funnel cake batter dipped, fried and topped with raspberry sauce, icing, and burnt almonds." I could go on and on, but why would I, when Defector has something better than all of them?
To really hit "a home run" on Defector's signature premium concession for the 2025 season, we turned to the one true genius on our staff: Chief AI/Metaverse Officer Devin The Mixed-Reality Dugong. Thanks to Devin's work with our cutting-edge AI technology, our proprietary algorithm was able to generate the ideal sandwich for everyone to enjoy while watching a baseball game.
Check out the video to see me introduce Devin The Dugong's Algorithmically Generated Sandwich, or follow along step by step below.
Baseball, of course, is America's pastime, and for that reason, our algorithmically generated sandwich started off with the most American of foods: baked macaroni and cheese.
But baseball is also an international sport, with appeal all over the world. The algorithm honors that diversity with its first addition to the sandwich: Swedish fish.
It's not only Swedes that play baseball, however. This is a sport with a rich Latin heritage, so it's appropriate that the algorithm included salsa on its sandwich.
The algorithm knows that any good sandwich packs plenty of protein in the middle, and we've got you covered there. Batting clean-up on this sandwich is a star attraction: meatloaf.
That's not all! On top of this already delicious sandwich, the algorithm added a second slice of meatloaf. A picture-perfect double play!
Some of you traditionalists might be getting a little worried. This may not be the kind of sandwich that you're used to. But in a very savvy move, the algorithm topped all of this with a baseball classic: a hot dog bun.
Now this sandwich just needed a little seasoning, and the algorithm revealed to us the most optimal seasoning: salt.
Finally, the algorithm completed its masterpiece with the other half of the mac-and-cheese bun.
But we're not quite done yet! We're going to let this sandwich sit in the hallway a little while, Defector-style.
I had the privilege of being the first to try Devin The Dugong's Algorithmically Generated Sandwich, and I can proudly say that this is the kind of sandwich that only artificial intelligence could create.
It's shaping up to be another winning season for Devin The Mixed-Reality Dugong and his revolutionary work in the metaverse/AI space!
Video Footage: Samer Kalaf
Photos: Sabrina Imbler
Graphics: Dan McQuade
Script & Video Editing: Lauren Theisen
