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Billy Haisley

Lautaro Martinez of FC Internazionale in action during the UEFA Champions League group C match between FC Barcelona and FC Internazionale at Spotify Camp Nou on October 12, 2022 in Barcelona, Spain.

Lautaro Martínez Went Bigger Than Bull Mode On Barcelona

Luis Paez-Pumar

Hirving Lozano of Napoli celebrates after scoring the first goal for Napoli during the UEFA Champions League group A match between SSC Napoli and AFC Ajax at Stadio Diego Armando Maradona on October 12, 2022 in Naples, Italy.

Napoli Is Soaring To The Top Of Europe

Laura Wagner

PAMPLONA, SPAIN - OCTOBER 11: Megan Rapinoe of USA reacts during the Women's International Friendly match between Spain and USA at El Sadar Stadium on October 11, 2022 in Pamplona, Spain

USWNT Loses Two In A Row

Kylian Mbappe of Paris Saint-Germain arrives to the stadium for the Ligue 1 match between Stade Reims and Paris Saint-Germain at Stade Auguste Delaune on October 08, 2022 in Reims, France.

Kylian Mbappé Wants To Leave A PSG He Couldn’t Make His Own

Patrick Redford

LONDON, ENGLAND - JULY 30: Gabriel Jesus of Arsenal celebrates scoring their 3rd goal with Martin Odegaard during Pre-Season Friendly, The Emirates Cup match between Arsenal and Sevilla at Emirates Stadium on July 30, 2022 in London, England. (Photo by Charlotte Wilson/Offside/Offside via Getty Images)

Why Can’t This Be Arsenal’s Year To Win The League?

Tom Ley

NWSL Report Reveals Systemic Abuse, Institutional Failures

DÜSSELDORF, GERMANY - SEPTEMBER 23: Aaron Long #5 of the United States looking for an open man during a game between Japan and USMNT at Düsseldorf Arena on September 23, 2022 in Düsseldorf, Germany. (Photo by Brad Smith/ISI Photos/Getty Images)

What Is This USMNT Guy’s Deal: Aaron Long

Neymar Jr of Brazil celebrates after scoring their side's third goal with his teammates Raphinha and Lucas Paqueta during the international friendly match between Brazil and Tunisia at Parc des Princes on September 27, 2022 in Paris, France.

The World Cup Is South America’s To Win

Head coach Jorge Vilda of Spain looks on during the FIFA Women's World Cup 2023 Qualifier group B match between Spain and Ukraine at Ciudad del Futbol de Las Rozas on September 06, 2022 in Madrid, Spain.

The Spanish Soccer Federation Is Once Again Going To War Against Its Own Players

Kaoru Mitoma of Team Japan celebrates scoring their team's second goal during the International Friendly match between Japan and United States at Merkur Spiel-Arena on September 23, 2022 in Duesseldorf, Germany.

Japan Hands The USMNT A Reality Check

ST PAUL, MN - AUGUST 09: Paul Arriola attends a mix zone during a training session ahead of the MLS All Stars and Liga MX All Stars game at National Sports Center on August 9, 2022 in St Paul, Minnesota. (Photo by Omar Vega/Getty Images)

What Is This USMNT Guy’s Deal: Paul Arriola

Robert Lewandowski centre-forward of Barcelona and Poland lament a failed occasion during the UEFA Champions League group C match between FC Bayern München and FC Barcelona at Allianz Arena on September 13, 2022 in Munich, Germany.

Barcelona’s Latest Moral Victory Is Only As Good As Its Next Actual Victory

Albert Burneko

Pedri, Barcelona, reacts to some bad stuff happening in the Champions League

Pedri Did Everything Right, Except For The Most Important Thing

Antoine Griezmann of Atletico de Madrid celebrates after scoring his teams second goal during the UEFA Champions League group B match between Atletico Madrid and FC Porto at Civitas Metropolitano Stadium on September 7, 2022 in Madrid, Spain.

Antoine Griezmann Is Eating Shit With A Smile

PARIS, FRANCE - SEPTEMBER 06: Weston McKennie of Juventus celebrates after scoring his team's first goal during the UEFA Champions League group H match between Paris Saint-Germain and Juventus at Parc des Princes on September 6, 2022 in Paris, France. (Photo by Harry Langer/DeFodi Images via Getty Images)

What Is This USMNT Guy’s Deal: Weston McKennie

Mohamed Salah of Liverpool looks dejected after Piotr Zielinski (not pictured) of SSC Napoli scores their team's fourth goal during the UEFA Champions League group A match between SSC Napoli and Liverpool FC at Stadio Diego Armando Maradona on September 07, 2022 in Naples, Italy.

Liverpool Is Broken

Ray Ratto

ZAGREB, CROATIA - SEPTEMBER 06: Thomas Tuchel, Manager of Chelsea looks on prior to the UEFA Champions League group E match between Dinamo Zagreb and Chelsea FC at Stadion Maksimir on September 06, 2022 in Zagreb, Croatia. (Photo by Jurij Kodrun/Getty Images)

Thomas Tuchel Wore Out Another Welcome

ST. PAUL, MN - FEBRUARY 02: Walker Zimmerman #3 of the United States dribbles the ball against Honduras in the first half of a World Cup Qualifying game at Allianz Field on February 2, 2022 in St. Paul, Minnesota. The United States defeated Honduras 3-0. (Photo by David Berding/Getty Images)

What Is This USMNT Guy’s Deal: Walker Zimmerman

VAR Isn’t The Only Way To Piss Away A Game

Erling Haaland of Manchester City celebrates his hat trick during the Premier League match between Manchester City and Crystal Palace at Etihad Stadium on August 27, 2022 in Manchester, England.

The Erling Haaland Show Has Only Just Begun

Is This Magic, Or One Of The Worst Calls In History?

GLASGOW, SCOTLAND - AUGUST 09: Malik Tillman of Rangers celebrates scoring his team's third goal during the UEFA Champions League Third Qualifying Round second leg match between Glasgow Rangers and Royale Union Saint-Gilloise at Ibrox Stadium on August 09, 2022 in Glasgow, Scotland. (Photo by Ian MacNicol/Getty Images)

What Is This USMNT Guy’s Deal: Malik Tillman

Real Sociedad's Swedish forward Alexander Isak celebrates scoring his team's first goal during the Spanish league football match between Real Sociedad and Villarreal CF at the Anoeta stadium in San Sebastian on December 18, 2021.

Newcastle United Is Betting Big On Alexander Isak

Lyons Brazilian midfielder Lucas Paqueta celebrates during the French L1 football match between Olympique Lyonnais (OL) and FC Nantes at The Groupama Stadium in Decines-Charpieu, central-eastern France on May 14, 2022.

Window Shopping: Lucas Paquetá Does It All

Leeds United's US midfielder Brenden Aaronson (R) celebrates after scoring his team first goal during the English Premier League football match between Leeds United and Chelsea at Elland Road in Leeds, northern England, on August 21, 2022. - RESTRICTED TO EDITORIAL USE. No use with unauthorized audio, video, data, fixture lists, club/league logos or 'live' services. Online in-match use limited to 120 images. An additional 40 images may be used in extra time. No video emulation. Social media in-match use limited to 120 images. An additional 40 images may be used in extra time. No use in betting publications, games or single club/league/player publications. (Photo by Paul ELLIS / AFP) / RESTRICTED TO EDITORIAL USE. No use with unauthorized audio, video, data, fixture lists, club/league logos or 'live' services. Online in-match use limited to 120 images. An additional 40 images may be used in extra time. No video emulation. Social media in-match use limited to 120 images. An additional 40 images may be used in extra time. No use in betting publications, games or single club/league/player publications. / RESTRICTED TO EDITORIAL USE. No use with unauthorized audio, video, data, fixture lists, club/league logos or 'live' services. Online in-match use limited to 120 images. An additional 40 images may be used in extra time. No video emulation. Social media in-match use limited to 120 images. An additional 40 images may be used in extra time. No use in betting publications, games or single club/league/player publications. (Photo by PAUL ELLIS/AFP via Getty Images)

Leeds United, America’s Premier League Team, Is Flying