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Sports

Luis Paez-Pumar

Don’t Put Commercials In Soccer, You Assholes

Albert Burneko

Gavi, Noooo! (But Also, Yesss.)

Kai Havertz of Chelsea interacts with Virgil van Dijk of Liverpool during the Premier League match between Chelsea and Liverpool at Stamford Bridge on January 02, 2022 in London, England.

Liverpool Has Lost Control

Tom Ley

Manchester City Is Swinging The Sword

Patrick Redford

Barcelona's US defender Sergino Dest controls the ball during the Spanish League football match between FC Barcelona and Deportivo Alaves at the Camp Nou stadium in Barcelona on October 30, 2021. (Photo by Pau BARRENA / AFP) (Photo by PAU BARRENA/AFP via Getty Images)

Sergiño Dest Is Probably Moving On Up From Barcelona And It Feels Terrible

Premier League Managers Are Fed Up

Laura Wagner

The Sports Highlight Of The Day Is This Roma Teen Pretending He Scored A Goal

SEATTLE, WASHINGTON - MAY 23: George Bello #21 of Atlanta United against Alex Roldan #16 of Seattle Sounders during the first half at Lumen Field on May 23, 2021 in Seattle, Washington. (Photo by Steph Chambers/Getty Images)

What Is This USMNT Guy’s Deal: George Bello

General view of a Tottenham sign under the arch outside the stadium before the Premier League match between Tottenham Hotspur and Watford FC at Wembley Stadium on January 30, 2019 in London, United Kingdom.

Tottenham’s COVID-19 Outbreak Is Worrying

Billy Haisley

Marc Andre ter Stegen, keeper of FC Barcelona reacts as Leroy Sané of Muenchen scores the second goal during the UEFA Champions League group E match between FC Bayern München and FC Barcelona at Football Arena Munich on December 08, 2021 in Munich, Germany.

Barcelona Takes Another Big Step Back

Wendell of FC Porto clashes with Matheus Cunha of Atletico Madrid during the UEFA Champions League group B match between FC Porto and Atletico Madrid at Estadio do Dragao on December 07, 2021 in Porto, Portugal.

Atlético Madrid-Porto Was Soccer At Its Dumbest

Rafa Benítez Can’t Afford To Screw This Up Now

Real Madrid's Brazilian forward Vinicius Junior celebrates after scoring his team's first goal during the Spanish League football match between Real Sociedad and Real Madrid CF at the Anoeta stadium in San Sebastian on December 4, 2021.

Vinícius Go Boom

Gioacchini giving an interview after arriving at Montpellier

What Is This USMNT Guy’s Deal:  Nicholas Gioacchini

Jordan Pickford of Everton fails to save the Liverpool second goal scored by Mohamed Salah during the Premier League match between Everton and Liverpool at Goodison Park on December 01, 2021 in Liverpool, England.

The Big Three Rule The Premier League With An Iron Fist

Liverpool's Spanish midfielder Thiago Alcantara shoots to score their third goal during the English Premier League football match between Liverpool and Southampton at Anfield in Liverpool, north west England on November 27, 2021.

Everything Thiago Does Is Perfect

Bayern Munich's players celebrate their second goal during the UEFA Champions League football match between Dynamo Kiev and Bayern Munich at the Olympic Stadium in Kiev on November 23, 2021.

Resistance Is Futile Against Bayern Munich

Joao Cancelo of Manchester City is challenged by Trent Alexander-Arnold of Liverpool during the Premier League match between Manchester City and Liverpool at Etihad Stadium on November 08, 2020 in Manchester, England.

The Premier League’s Two Best Full Backs Are On A Whole Nother Level

Clark celebrating a win over Atlanta United

What Is This USMNT Guy’s Deal: Caden Clark


<p>Claire Watkins is a musician and writer living in Chicago, IL.</p>


Claire Watkins

This NWSL Final Is The Result Of Knockout Soccer At Its Best

Lisandro Martínez of Argentina competes for the ball with Vinicius Junior of Brazil during a match between Argentina and Brazil as part of FIFA World Cup Qatar 2022 Qualifiers at San Juan del Bicentenario Stadium on November 16, 2021 in San Juan, Argentina.

It’s All Coming Together For Vinícius

CINCINNATI, OH - NOVEMBER 12: Tim Weah #20 of the United States controls the ball during the FIFA World Cup 2022 Qualifier match against Mexico at TQL Stadium on November 12, 2021 in Cincinnati, Ohio. (Photo by Kirk Irwin/Getty Images)

Tim Weah Answers All The Right Questions

Kheira Hamraoui #14 of Paris Saint-Germain takes the field before playing against Chicago Red Stars during The Women's Cup Third Place match at Lynn Family Stadium on August 21, 2021 in Louisville, Kentucky.

The Totally Insane Story About The Attacked PSG Player Has Only Gotten More Insane

Portugal's forward Cristiano Ronaldo reacts during the FIFA World Cup Qatar 2022 qualification group A football match between Portugal and Serbia, at the Luz stadium in Lisbon, on November 14, 2021.

Fernando Santos Was Never The Right Manager For Portugal

Weston McKennie #8 of the United States is congratulated by Christian Pulisic #10 and Tyler Adams #4 after scoring a goal during the second half of the FIFA World Cup 2022 Qualifier match against Mexico at TQL Stadium on November 12, 2021 in Cincinnati, Ohio. The United States defeated Mexico 2-0.

The USMNT Is Legit As Hell