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This is Defector, a new sports blog and media company. We made this place together, we own it together, we run it together. Without access, without favor, without discretion, and without interference.

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Columnist. Author of many <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Drew-Magary/e/B001JS8R52/ref=dp_byline_cont_pop_book_1">fine works of literature</a>, including Point B. Handsomest man in the world.

Drew Magary

How Old Are You In Your Dreams?

The Prince of Wales looks closely at the Sanyo UK Microwave Oven from the Steel Life' range, during an award ceremony held at The Victoria and Albert Museum in central. * The Homes and Gardens Classical Design Awards, recognise and reward outstanding contempary British Design in everyday items, the magazine Readers Award went to the Sanyo oven which was chosen for unusually simple, pleasant and modern styling. (Photo by Peter Jordan - PA Images/PA Images via Getty Images)

Do Not Besmirch The “Add 30 Seconds” Microwave Button

'The Luncheon in the Conservatory', 1877. Three generations of a prosperous family relax and talk at the end of an informal meal in their conservatory where the plants are as flourishing as their owners. From the Musee des Beaux Arts, Pau, France. (Photo by Art Media/Print Collector/Getty Images)

A Brief But Convincing Defense Of Snobbery

Walnuts In Baked Goods: The Right Move, Or An Act Of War?

during the Monster Energy NASCAR Cup Series Coke Zero Sugar 400 at Daytona International Speedway on July 7, 2018 in Daytona Beach, Florida.

The American Flag Isn’t Just For Aggro Fuckheads

One Last Halloween In The Candy Trenches

Chicken Pot Pie from Costco. Note....Meagen Ogilvie story.(September 26 11RICK EGLINTON/TORONTO STAR.

Some Annoying Recipes Are Worth It. LIKE MY KICK-ASS POT PIE.

It’s Time I Started Wearing Other Teams’ Shit

Recency Bias Is Boring

A cub scout takes off his shoes and socks before going for a paddle, circa 1955. (Photo by FPG/Hulton Archive/Getty Images)

Taking Off Your Socks Is The Greatest Feeling On Earth

A boy in bed with a copy of 'Horror Stories' comic book, circa 1960. (Photo by Hunter/FPG/Hulton Archive/Getty Images)

Help! My Kid Knows About Death Now!

Cyclist on the Keizersgracht in Amsterdam, In the background the houses of Keizersgracht 718-716. On the right the Reguliersgracht., George Hendrik Breitner, printer: Harm Botman (mentioned on object), Amsterdam, printer: Netherlands, c. 1890 - c. 1910, paper, gelatin silver print, height 50.5 cm × width 40.0 cmheight 40.0 cm × width 27.4 cm. (Photo by: Sepia Times/Universal Images Group via Getty Images)

Lessons I Have Learned So Far As A Bike Guy

NEW YORK, USA, September 11: Carlos Alcaraz of Spain falls to the court at match point as he celebrates his victory against Casper Ruud of Norway in the Men's Singles Final match on Arthur Ashe Stadium during the US Open Tennis Championship 2022 at the USTA National Tennis Centre on September 11th 2022 in Flushing, Queens, New York City. (Photo by Tim Clayton/Corbis via Getty Images)

What Is The Most Physically Exhausting Sport?

TOPSHOT - Dave Barnes enjoys a holiday lunch with his wife Christy Barnes at an outdoor restaurant in Manhattan Beach, California where beaches are closed due to a spike in COVID-19 in Los Angeles County, on July 4, 2020, the US Independence Day holiday. - Beaches and indoor restaurant seating in Los Angeles County are closed to help fight the spread of the coronavirus pandemic. (Photo by Robyn Beck / AFP) (Photo by ROBYN BECK/AFP via Getty Images)

There Are No More Shitty Food Towns In America

Albert Burneko

We Must Protect Soccer From Grubby Rule-Mongers

SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA - JULY 08: Wilmer Flores #41 of the San Francisco Giants reacts to fouling a ball off his foot during the fouth inning of a game against the San Diego Padres at PETCO Park on July 08, 2022 in San Diego, California. (Photo by Sean M. Haffey/Getty Images)

Does Wilmer Flores Have The Worst Walk-Up Music In Baseball?

Woman preparing pizza in kitchen, portrait

If You Don’t Sell Large Pizzas, Fuck You

A fully functioning solid gold toilet, made by Italian artist Maurizio Cattelan, is going into public use at the Guggenheim Museum in New York on September 15, 2016. - A guard will be stationed outside the bathroom to protect the work, entitled 'America', which recalls Marcel Duchamp's famous work, 'Fountain'. (Photo by William EDWARDS / AFP) (Photo by WILLIAM EDWARDS/AFP via Getty Images)

Help! I Love To Shit In The Nude!

Kathryn Xu

How To Finish A Loaf Of Bread

Snoop Dogg may be one of the world's most famous entertainers, but SeaWorld San Diego's Clyde the Sea Lion wanted the rapper to know that he too can "Bring the Bling." Snoop Dogg, who was recently in San Diego for a concert, spent a few hours at the marine-life park interacting with several of the SeaWorld's animals and shared some center-stage time with Clyde at Sea Lion and Otter Stadium. Clyde said he'd be happy to collaborate with Snoop Dogg on one of his future hip-hop songs! Photo: Bob Couey - SeaWorld San Diego Contact: Bob Couey Visual Services Manager SeaWorld San Diego

Lightweight Activewear Is The Most Important Invention Of Our Lifetimes

It’s True: Your Parents Will Eventually Possess Your Body

COLMA, CA - FEBRUARY 1: A man wearing a hazardous materials suit walks through a decontamination shower during a weapons of mass destruction training workshop February 1, 2005 in Colma, California. Representatives from several San Mateo County police and fire departments took part in the one day training to prepare for a chemical or biological attack. (Photo by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images)

It’s Your Rays Week Funbag, Featuring An Email From A Ray

Cane toad Agathe sits on a toy balance during an inventory at the zoo in Hanover, central Germany, on January 5, 2011. All habitants of the zoo are to be counted, weighed and measured during the week long inventory. Agathe has a weight of 1850 grams. AFP PHOTO HOLGER HOLLEMANN GERMANY OUT (Photo credit should read HOLGER HOLLEMANN/DPA/AFP via Getty Images)

So It’s Come To This: My Life Counting Calories

I Know Exactly What Kind Of Professional Wrestler I Would Be

charismatic megafauna (they/them)

Sabrina Imbler

A tick is photographed in the laboratory of the INRA (Institut National de la Recherche Agronomique) which constitutes a "tiquothèque" to study its geographical distribution, the presence of disease, the development of the Lyme disease on September 28, 2018 in Champenoux, eastern France. - The laboratory appeals to the private individuals to collect the ticks having pricked them. (Photo by JEAN-CHRISTOPHE VERHAEGEN / AFP) (Photo by JEAN-CHRISTOPHE VERHAEGEN/AFP via Getty Images)