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This is Defector, a new sports blog and media company. We made this place together, we own it together, we run it together. Without access, without favor, without discretion, and without interference.

Defector

Albert Burneko

This Is So Stupid

Experts: Albert Burneko Is Handsome And It’s Cool To Just Give Him Money

A very tiny green baby tomato on the vine

Chefector

It Is Not Yet Tomato Time, Blasphemers

Damian Lillard and Portland Trail Blazers fans

Damian Lillard Can’t Get Away With Being Human

Duke coach Mike Krzyzewski makes a weird face

College Basketball

See You Later To This Butthead

Danny Ainge Finally Delivers The Big Move

Some chicken, with a little potato salad peeking up from the bottom of the frame

Let’s Smoke Some Chicken On A Regular Charcoal Grill

Walter Johnson grips what looks like a cut fastball in 1925.

What Is Dealing, And What Is Not

Kevin Durant of the Brooklyn Nets, in a hoodie, making a goofus face

A Timely And Incredibly Expert Preview Of The 2021 NBA Playoffs

Manny Machado Hits Another Middle Infielder With A Bizarre, Sloppy Slide

You Can Always Just Throw Together Some Seafood Stew

Chas McCormick thrown out at home in the bottom of the 10th by Joey Gallo

I Want To See The Dang Throw!

Jordan Zimmermann celebrates his 2014 no-hitter against the Marlins

No No-Hitter Ended Better Than Jordan Zimmermann’s

Senators Week

Stop Referring To The “Caning” Of Charles Sumner!

A plate of oysters, a bowl of mignonette sauce, and the Chefector badge

Let’s Shuck And Eat Some Oysters

Picture taken on January 15, 1937 at Palm Springs showing a bartender mixing a cocktail under water in a swimming pool. (Photo by - / ACME / AFP) (Photo by -/ACME/AFP via Getty Images)

Science

Barkeep, A Glass Of Your Finest Chemolithotroph Peepee, If You Please

Head coach Nate Bjorkgren diagrams a play for the Indiana Pacers during a timeout

Let’s Check In On The Indiana Pacers, As Well As, For No Particular Reason, The Atlanta Hawks

Kart racer Luca Corberi hurls a detached bumper at another racer in last October's karting world championships

Defector Up All Night

The Thing About Trying To Kill A Guy With A Kart Bumper Is It’s Against The Rules Of Kart Racing

Let’s Cook Some Black Bean Soup

SAN JOSE, CALIFORNIA - FEBRUARY 27: Ryan O'Reilly #90 of the St. Louis Blues warms up before their game against the San Jose Sharks at SAP Center on February 27, 2021 in San Jose, California. (Photo by Ezra Shaw/Getty Images)

Media Meltdowns

Everyone Reading This Beat Writer’s Insanely Worded Tweet Understands It Completely. Or At Least Is Capable Of Understanding Written Language.

Bill Simmons: Cancel Culture Prevented Jim Nantz From Making A Cheap Racist Quip About Hideki Matsuyama, And That’s A Shame

A single Tesla sedan drives through a tunnel

To Truly Appreciate The Elon Musk Tunnel Footage, You Must Hear It Set To Music

Rory McIlroy's father reacts to being struck by his own son's second shot on the 7th hole of the Masters

Golf

Rory McIlroy Smote His Own Father With A Golf Shot

Sports Highlight Of The Day

The Sports Highlight Of The Day Is This Japanese Baseball Team’s Fish Mascot Exploding Into Its New Form

A bunch of fried seafood and lemons, with the Chefector badge