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As Defector has convened in New York for company meetings, we’ve also welcomed two new interns for the summer. Say hello to Heather Chen and Owen Lewis!

Heather: Have you ever wondered what it would feel like to sit next to two sizeable cardboard cutouts of David Roth? To live amongst piles and piles of baseball cards?

Owen: Only every day of my life.

Heather: You’re reading this and wondering, Who are these two complete strangers dialoguing in front of me right now? Has someone hacked into the Defector content management system??? Don’t worry, we’re not breaking and entering. In fact, it took us 10 minutes to figure out how to lock the door to the Defector office on Tuesday.

Owen: Doesn’t that fill you with confidence in us? We are Defector’s (two!) new editorial interns, continuing in the Fibonacci-style line of those who came before us. From the intern void appeared Kathryn Xu in 2022, then Abigail Segel last year, now Heather and me. Next year, there will be three, then five, then eight, then 13—you know the sequence. 2034 will bring us 233 brand-new Defector interns! Feel free to ask Tom Ley for further details.

Heather: Speaking of Tom Ley—help! Where did he go?? On Wednesday and Thursday, Owen and I were left to fend for ourselves in the wilderness of the office, because the rest of the staff is at “meetings” or something. An extended hazing ritual, perhaps?

Owen: It has to be. First we had to bowl against Jasper and Samer. Then we played a murder mystery game. Finally came karaoke. 

Heather: Nevertheless, we persist. Despite it being (almost) summer, I’ll be joining Defector as one of their few hockey heathens. In between, I might also dabble in the topics of bizarre arrests and right-wing podcasters.

Owen: I’ll be writing about tennis, boxing, and perhaps the occasional anecdote from my attempts to be a competitive runner in high school. 

Heather: Anyway, thank you for supporting Defector! Without all of you subscribers, we wouldn’t have had the experience of learning how to lock a door.

Owen: Hear, hear. Everyone on staff is a brilliant writer, but having met them in person this week, I can also say that they’re incredibly nice people. So I only accepted a small bribe of $150 to say that.

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