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Ray Ratto

DALLAS, TEXAS - JANUARY 05: Stephen Curry #30 of the Golden State Warriors reacts after being fouled by Luka Doncic #77 of the Dallas Mavericks in the third quarter at American Airlines Center on January 05, 2022 in Dallas, Texas. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. (Photo by Tom Pennington/Getty Images)

How The West Wasn’t One-On-One

BOSTON, MASSACHUSETTS - MAY 17: Starting pitcher Nathan Eovaldi #17 of the Boston Red Sox reacts during the second inning of the game against the Houston Astros at Fenway Park on May 17, 2022 in Boston, Massachusetts. (Photo by Omar Rawlings/Getty Images)

Like Fort Sumter Or A Peanut, Nathan Eovaldi Got Shelled

WASHINGTON, DC - MAY 09: Carter Verhaeghe #23 of the Florida Panthers celebrates with teammates after scoring the game-winning goal against the Washington Capitals during overtime in Game Four of the First Round of the 2022 Stanley Cup Playoffs at Capital One Arena on May 09, 2022 in Washington, DC. (Photo by Patrick Smith/Getty Images)

Even The Panthers’ Schedule Gets No Respect

CALGARY, AB - MAY 15: The Calgary Flames celebrate after defeating the Dallas Stars during the overtime period of Game Seven of the First Round of the 2022 Stanley Cup Playoffs at Scotiabank Saddledome on May 15, 2022 in Calgary, Alberta, Canada. The Flames defeated the Stars 3-2 in overtime. (Photo by Derek Leung/Getty Images)

It’s Time For Alberta To Relearn How To Hate

Shohei Ohtani Is Just Getting Started

It’s Important To Appreciate The Human Element In Baseball, Like An Ump Forgetting How To Count

INGLEWOOD, CALIFORNIA - OCTOBER 10: The National Football League offices on October 10, 2021 in Inglewood, California. (Photo by Ronald Martinez/Getty Images)

The NFL Schedule Release Demeans Us All

Tom Brady’s One And Only Job As A Broadcaster Will Be To Exist

Josh Naylor Hit A Hell Of A Lot Of Homers For The Guardians Last Night, Which Certainly Proves Something

Did I Say Grizzlies-Warriors Would Be A Great Rivalry? I Lied

ST LOUIS, MO - MAY 08: Mats Zuccarello #36 Matt Dumba #24 Marc-Andre Fleury #29 Jonas Brodin #25 and Kirill Kaprizov #97 of the Minnesota Wild defend the net against Colton Parayko #55 Pavel Buchnevich #89 and Ivan Barbashev #49 of the St. Louis Blues in the third period of Game Four of the First Round of the 2022 Stanley Cup Playoffs at Enterprise Center on May 8, 2022 in St Louis, Missouri. (Photo by Joe Puetz/Getty Images)

Everyone But Colorado Needs To Get It Together

Ja Morant #12 of the Memphis Grizzlies handles the ball against Jordan Poole #3 of the Golden State Warriors during Game Two of the Western Conference Semifinals of the NBA Playoffs at FedExForum on May 03, 2022 in Memphis, Tennessee.

Grizzlies-Warriors Has All The Ingredients For The Next Great NBA Rivalry

Things Have Somehow Gotten Even Worse For The Reds

Soccer

Carlo Ancelotti, Everyone’s Cool Soccer Uncle, Just Keeps Winning

Luka Doncic of the Dallas Mavericks reacts on the court during the second half of Game One of the Western Conference Second Round NBA Playoffs against the Phoenix Suns at Footprint Center on May 02, 2022 in Phoenix, Arizona. The Suns defeated the Mavericks 121-114.

Luka Doncic Is Going It Alone

The Leafs Remain The Leafs Until Further Notice

OAKLAND, CALIFORNIA - OCTOBER 01: Oakland Athletics team president Dave Kaval waves a flag after they tied their game against the Chicago White Sox in the fourth inning of Game Three of the American League wild card series at RingCentral Coliseum on October 01, 2020 in Oakland, California. (Photo by Ezra Shaw/Getty Images)

Oakland A’s President Gets Into Argument With Seagull, Loses

SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA - APRIL 09: Manager Gabe Kapler #19 of the San Francisco Giants looks on from the dugout against the Miami Marlins at the start of the fifth inning at Oracle Park on April 09, 2022 in San Francisco, California. (Photo by Thearon W. Henderson/Getty Images)

Winning Is “The Right Way”

NEW YORK, NEW YORK - APRIL 25: Kyrie Irving #11 of the Brooklyn Nets reacts in the first half against the Boston Celtics during Game Four of the Eastern Conference First Round Playoffs against the Boston Celtics at Barclays Center on April 25, 2022 in the Brooklyn borough of New York City. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. (Photo by Elsa/Getty Images)

The Nets’ Making Was Their Undoing

TELFORD, ENGLAND - NOVEMBER 20: A Japanese Bantam is seen at the National Poultry Show on November 20, 2016 in Telford, England. The annual event continues to grow with around 7000 entries this year from all around the world. (Photo by Leon Neal/Getty Images)

Elder Wisdom

And So, After All These Years, We Meet Again, My Greatest Enemy: Chicken

INGLEWOOD, CALIFORNIA - JANUARY 30: Deebo Samuel #19 of the San Francisco 49ers looks on during warm ups before the NFC Championship Game against the Los Angeles Rams at SoFi Stadium on January 30, 2022 in Inglewood, California. (Photo by Christian Petersen/Getty Images)

Deebo Samuel Did Us All A Favor

OAKLAND, CALIFORNIA - APRIL 19: Cole Irvin #19 of the Oakland Athletics pitches against the Baltimore Orioles in the first inning at RingCentral Coliseum on April 19, 2022 in Oakland, California. (Photo by Ezra Shaw/Getty Images)

A’s Fans Have Had About Enough

SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA - APRIL 18: JaMychal Green #0 of the Denver Nuggets and Nemanja Bjelica #8 of the Golden State Warriors go for a rebound during Game Two of the Western Conference First Round NBA Playoffs at Chase Center on April 18, 2022 in San Francisco, California. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and/or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. (Photo by Ezra Shaw/Getty Images)

Give Me Game 7 Or Go To Hell

Roki Sasaki Is Still Perfect

CHICAGO, ILLINOIS - SEPTEMBER 19: Owner Tom Ricketts of the Chicago Cubs is seen on the field before the Cubs take on the St. Louis Cardinals at Wrigley Field on September 19, 2019 in Chicago, Illinois. (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images)