Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers has a messed-up toe. He said as much following his team's loss to the Vikings on Sunday, describing the injury as "very, very painful" to reporters. Nobody really knows exactly what is specifically wrong with the toe, though, and because this story involves Aaron Rodgers, anyone who is genuinely curious about what's actually going on must now grapple with his particularly annoying brand of trolling.
TheWall Street Journal published a story today claiming that Rodgers has a case of "Covid Toe," a real medical issue that has been affecting people who have contracted the virus throughout the pandemic. The Journal's story describes the affliction as one that leaves a person with discoloration and painful lesions on their toes, and its diagnosis is based on a comment Rodgers made while appearing on The Pat McAfee Show on Tuesday. When Rodgers was asked by McAfee how his recovery from the coronavirus was going, he responded, "No lingering effects, other than Covid Toe." That sure seems like a cut-and-dry statement of fact when it's written out, but here is how Rodgers actually delivered that answer:
Hmmm. So does Aaron Rodgers actually have Covid Toe, or is the smirking bastard who already deployed similar shenanigans with his use of the word "immunized" simply fucking with people? There is only one way to clear this up: Aaron Rodgers must show toe. We need to see high-resolution photos of those piggies so that they can be inspected for evidence of discoloration and lesions.
You must do this, Aaron Rodgers. You must let me and the rest of America see your feet, because only then will you truly become the Totally Epic Quarterback you have always dreamed of becoming. Show 'em!