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Life's Rich Pageant

This Chonky Cat Is 29.5 Pounds

A title card. It has a man (Dan McQuade) holding a giant fat cat. He's wearing a Garfield hoodie (the man, not the cat). The header says "DEFECTOR: Dan McQuade in Cats Love Me. Episode 1: Lasagna."

The Internet may be a terrifying hellscape, but it has increased exponentially our ability to look at cute cats. Yesterday, I was scrolling through that hellscape when I saw a bit of heaven from the Animal Care & Control Team of Philadelphia: this giant, 29.5-pound cat.

Poor big kitty! Sarah Barnett, ACCT Philly’s development and communications director, told me the cat was left in a dog crate on Sunday at the nonprofit’s North Philly intake center. The front desk named her Lasagna.

Lasagna is nearly 30 pounds. And while Lasagna is a pretty active cat and the extra weight isn’t currently causing her any health problems, it could in the future. Yes, chonky cats are cute and all—but they really do need to lose weight to live healthier, longer lives. Think how cute Lasagna will be when she can properly groom herself!

Barnett says ACCT Philly is seeing more obese cats coming in than usual in recent months. It’s probably COVID-19 related, as pet owners are home all the time now and might be feeding their pets more than they need to. ACCT is dealing with COVID-19 issues itself; it was closed from March and only reopened in summer. Budget cuts—ACCT has contracts with the city—have forced more of its money to come from donations.

When I met Lasagna on Wednesday, she already had plenty of admirers.  On Thursday, ACCT told me she’ll be adopted out by day’s end.

Made by Dan McQuade
Additional production by Barry Petchesky
Some b-roll courtesy of ACCT Philly
Music by K. Liakos, Casey Wilcox/Epidemic Sound