“Baseball isn’t just a game,” author Tom Tatum once wrote. “It’s life being played out on a field – a field of dreams – on diamonds of green, where players pursuing their dreams try to be the best they can be on the grandest stage of all – where men become boys and boys become men, all speaking one universal language without uttering a single word.” Tatum’s words have finally found their truest example in the following play, lovingly crafted for us all to laugh at by Pirates first baseman Will Craig, a true auteur in the competitive genre of boneheaded baseball masterpieces. Bask in its idiotic glory.
There were two outs. You need three to end a baseball inning. Maybe Craig didn’t know this? Craig could have prevented this extremely preventable disaster at several points here, by either tagging Javy Baez, tossing it to home plate earlier, or simply stepping onto the first base. The inning would be over, and no runs would have scored. Instead, he did whatever the hell that was, for which I am eternally grateful. Everyone was so befuddled that Baez had time to easily slide into first then saunter to second after calling Willson Contreras safe at home. The play was officially ruled a fielder’s choice with a throwing error by catcher Michael Perez, which I suppose is both technically correct and spiritually wrong. Either way, Baez scored from second base two pitches later, compounding Craig’s fuckup.
The call from the Pirates radio crew is also incredible.
One inning later, the umpire ruled that Pirates pitcher Tyler Anderson hit Patrick Wisdom. Pittsburgh challenged the ruling, had it changed to a foul ball, and then had to watch as Wisdom smacked his first Cubs dinger a few pitches later. Tatum was right: Baseball is a magisterial sport.