Embattled Deputy Mayor Does Not Know Ball

Things are not going well for New York City Mayor Eric Adams, and they haven't been for a while. The criminal charges filed against Adams on Thursday account for only a strand in the web of corruption allegations that has covered his administration. There are many other characters in this saga, including Deputy Mayor for Public Safety Phil Banks, who is no stranger to scandals himself and had his home raided by the FBI this month.

He also doesn't know shit about the Knicks! Following today's unsealing of the indictment against Adams, Banks was approached on the street and asked for comment by NY1 reporter Kelly Mena. As a graduate of the Fetterman School Of Political Oafs, Banks attempted to defuse the situation by talking about the upcoming Knicks season.

"I'm worried because the Knicks, they just need a little bit of perimeter defense, and I think at that particular point, we have a championship team," he said.

Phil? Are you stupid? The Knicks have plenty of perimeter defense. They need another big, you dummy. Did you forget that Isaiah Hartenstein left for Oklahoma City? Aren't you worried about who is going to step up and take his minutes? Do you even watch this goddamn team?

Thank you for your continued support of Defector. Onward.