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NFL

Adam Gase Ambles Onward, Unkillable

My drawing of Adam Gase as a zombie.
Illustration: Chris Thompson

The New York Jets lost again on Sunday, a humiliating 24-0 shutout at the hands of the Dolphins, who are themselves not much better than ho-hum. I woke up this morning quite certain that I would read about the overnight firing of head coach Adam Gase, who has deserved to be fired for very nearly as long as he has had this particular job. It is now Monday afternoon and there is no firing in sight. Every week the Jets hit some new low, and every week Gase climbs back atop the throne of crap at the head of this crap football operation like nothing happened.

The injustice of it is staggering. I demand a world in which there are consequences for this level of incompetence!

After falling to 0-6 with a 24-0 loss to the Dolphins on Sunday, the Jets have been outscored 185-75 so far this season. Their -110 point differential is by far the worst in the NFL, and it is equal to the combined point differentials of the second-worst and third-worst teams. (The Jaguars’ point differential is -56 and the Football Team’s point differential is -54.)

Project their current -110 point differential over a 16-game season, and the Jets would get outscored by 293 points this season. That would be the worst point differential in NFL history, topping the current record of -287 by the 1976 Buccaneers.

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Is Gase at least suffering the constant bellyache of fear that he will be fired at any moment? He is not.

How is it that you and I must confront the daily anxiety of job insecurity while the world’s worst football coach enjoys the peace of stability? For one thing, the presumptive interim in a post-Gase world would be the vile Gregg Williams, and perhaps even the Jets view that outcome as too grim to face. It’s also possible that the team is looking ahead to the 2021 draft and views the rewards for sucking mondo ass as more significant than the potential rewards for having an even semi-competent head coach over the remainder of this lost season. Or, most likely of all, owner Woody Johnson is too distracted by his idiot pal’s presidential re-election campaign to give a rip about his putrefying professional football organization. It’s an ideal confluence of circumstances for a person with zero redeeming qualities as a head football coach to collect as many unearned paychecks as possible, and Gase, via whatever unholy pact, is that person.

Does this blog mostly exist so that I can show you my doodle of Gase as a zombie? Sure, yes. Still! This damn Adam Gase quite simply cannot be destroyed, and I am sick of it.