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Humbled Urban Meyer Looks Like Absolute Shit As He Apologizes For Not Being A Family Man

It's not every day that an NFL coach is documented being horny at his own restaurant, and subsequently starts off his explanation for that by mentioning his grandkids. This saga isn't something that can be summarized in one post.

Urban Meyer, the Jacksonville Jaguars head coach at the time of writing, held a presser today. Wise of him to change back to a Jags pullover, but he still looked like shit. It was a significant change in demeanor. For comparison, here's Meyer at an Ohio State presser a few years ago. He makes eye contact and has some life in his voice. Now watch him in today's presser. That dude is broken or hungover, or both. He has trouble looking anyone in the face.

The first few questions asked of Meyer were, understandably, about what he was doing at his steakhouse in Columbus the day after his team lost on national television. "I just apologized to the team and staff for being a distraction," the coach said. "It was stupid. So I explained everything that happened and owned it, and just stupid—I should not have myself in that kind of position."

Then Meyer tried to explain how the night unfolded, and why he didn't fly back with the team. Sure, the Jags got the weekend off after losing 24-21 to the Bengals, but why didn't the head coach at least fly back with them?

"I stayed to see the grandkids, and we all went to dinner that night at a restaurant, and then there was a big group next to our restaurant," he said. "They wanted me to come over and take pictures, and I did, and they were trying to pull me out on the dance floor, screwing around, and I should have left."

Who is supposed to believe this? Does anyone believe this? Urban Meyer, a person who's held a lot of power in his career and still does as an NFL head coach, was just being a family man and having a nice dinner when a group that included jezebels and maybe even one temptress lured him over to the restaurant he owns and twisted his arm into taking photos and dancing with them. He couldn't do anything to stop it. No word on whether this extremely persuasive party forced Meyer to check this lady's oil:

It might be unwise to indict the entirety of the college football coaching industry based on Meyer's behavior here, but it is also easy because they do themselves no favors. The whole thing's covered in slime. Many if not all of these guys are unfamiliar with what happens when they leave for the pros and cease being the most prominent member of a community that's designed to prop them up and wipe away whatever dumb shit they fall into. What Meyer did this weekend and his handling of Zach Smith at Ohio State are in different realms, but his reaction to both is fundamentally the same: He holds all the power until it's time to answer for a bad decision. Then, he's unaware and helpless, but regretful.

Meyer did not specifically address why a woman, who wasn't his wife Shelley, was getting nasty with him at Urban Chophouse. The closest thing to answer on that matter was when he described his family as "upset." Buddy did not deserve that kind of night out.

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