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Chris Thompson

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chris.thompson@defector.com

@MadBastardsAll

President-Elect Joe Biden Must Direct The National Ignition Facility To Fire 192 Lasers At My Solar Plexus

A cool look at something called a preamplifier, which is part of the National Ignition Facility's effort at creating a self-sustaining fusion reaction.

Was Tom Brady Crud Tonight?

The Crud Meter shows that Tom Brady was pretty cruddy tonight.

Dabo Swinney Is The Perfect Shitbrained Coach For These Shitbrained Times

Death to the NCAA

Dabo Swinney blows hot air.

Dear God, Will Someone Please Fire Matt Patricia

Matt Patricia wears a mask and looks cagey on the Lions sideline.

Taysom Hill Goes Deep And Checks Down On The Same Throw

Taysom Hill winds up for a throw.

The Hoarse, Mucousy, Ashen-Faced Texans Do Not Have COVID-19

JJ Watt of the Texans rubs his eyes.

John Wall Wants The Wizards To Trade Him, Just As I Want The ESO’s Gigantic Quad-Laser To Vaporize My Corporeal Self

NEW YORK, NEW YORK - FEBRUARY 12: John Wall of the Washington Wizards sits on the bench in the first half against the New York Knicks at Madison Square Garden on February 12, 2020 in New York City. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. (Photo by Elsa/Getty Images)

Join Us For A Friday Staff Chat

Some old-timey types type at typewriters while blindfolded.

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The Knicks Did Something Cool That Probably Will Not Ever Matter, But Still

Bogdan Bogdanović Is A Hero For Nuking A Ho-Hum Sign-And-Trade

The face of Bogdan Bogdanovic.

Maybe People Care About Watching Sports Exactly As Much As They Should

Media Meltdowns

Dustin Johnson wears the green jacket and nobody gives a crap.

They Made An Interactive Virtual Tokamak And Buddy, It Rules

A look at my fully operational JET-style tokamak, churning out big numbers of what could be power but might in fact be deadly radiation.

An Astrophysicist Explains The Challenges Of De-Juicing The Baseball

A human cadaver positioned as if throwing a baseball at "Bodies...The Exhibition".

Sports Leagues Have Stopped Even Pretending To Give A Shit

Cowboys fans

A Medieval Historian Explains Why The Magna Carta Has Nothing To Do With COVID-19

No More Black NBA Uniforms, Please

Jayson Tatum and Daniel Theis look like crap in black Celtics alternate uniforms.

Red Sox Rehire Alex Cora, HEY LOOK OVER THERE

Alex Cora makes a stupid face as manager of the Boston Red Sox, back before he was fired for being a cheater.

Look At These Dorks

Life's Rich Pageant

A crowd of dorks chants "stop the vote" in front of an election station in Detroit.

Something Very Scary Is Happening With Trent Brown

Trent Brown of the Raiders chills on the sideline during a game against the Cardinals earlier this season.

The Flashlight Trick