Alert! Alert! Something dastardly has occurred. Former Duke star and current NBA analyst Jay Williams had his Twitter account hacked last night. It is unclear for how long this anonymous sicko had command of Williams’s account, but we can assume that this was the work of a highly trained operative. Who else would have the technical capacity and the sinister foresight to crack Williams’s password, bide their time, and then strike at the perfect moment, unleashing a single tweet so horrifying that Williams would never be able to recover from the damage to his reputation.
As the world cried out in horror over the apparent fact that Jay Williams had forgotten that the Boston Celtics have had several black head coaches, Williams was hard at work recovering his account from his formidable adversary. Thankfully, through the use of a highly advanced opsec tactic known as “changing your passcode,” Williams was able to regain control in a relatively short period of time:
Thankfully this emergency was handled before the hacker could do even more damage. Maybe there is a silver lining here for Williams, though, because a story this dramatic seems ripe for a movie or television adaptation. Someone call up Nathaniel Kaluuya and see if he’s interested in playing the starring role!
Update (9:47 a.m.): As it relates to the last sentence of this blog … I did not mistakenly refer to Daniel Kaluuya as Nathaniel Kaluuya. My passcode has now been changed.