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    <lastmod>2026-07-31T18:11:51Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>Can A Monkey Have A Pet?</news:title>
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      <news:title>Tony Romo On Leave From CBS After Drunk Driving Arrest</news:title>
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      <news:title>Kody Clemens Achieves The Ultimate Ultimate Grand Slam</news:title>
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    <lastmod>2026-07-31T17:50:20Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>Reports: Harrison Bader A Dope</news:title>
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    <lastmod>2026-07-31T16:33:35Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>Why Your Team Sucks 2026: Washington Commanders</news:title>
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    <lastmod>2026-07-31T18:45:05Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>Tom Dundon&amp;#039;s Shameless Minions Expand The Scope Of His War On Portland</news:title>
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    <loc>https://defector.com/ai-listings-have-made-apartment-hunting-even-more-debasing</loc>
    <lastmod>2026-07-31T18:25:28Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>AI Listings Have Made Apartment Hunting Even More Debasing</news:title>
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    <lastmod>2026-07-30T20:04:27Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>That&amp;#039;s Too Much Helicopter</news:title>
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    <lastmod>2026-07-31T14:18:40Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>Why Your Team Sucks 2026: Cleveland Browns</news:title>
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    <loc>https://defector.com/uefa-is-ready-to-go-to-war-with-fifa-over-the-world-cup</loc>
    <lastmod>2026-07-30T21:11:56Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>UEFA Is Ready To Go To War With FIFA Over The World Cup</news:title>
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    <loc>https://defector.com/abandoned-fish-sauce-canada-interview</loc>
    <lastmod>2026-07-31T16:58:03Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>Let Me And A Food Scientist Sample The Abandoned Fish Sauce Terrorizing A Small Canadian Town</news:title>
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    <loc>https://defector.com/baseballs-labor-history-is-repeating-itself-once-again</loc>
    <lastmod>2026-07-31T16:02:25Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>Baseball&amp;#039;s Labor History Is Repeating Itself Once Again</news:title>
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    <lastmod>2026-07-30T21:18:32Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>The Best Music Of 2026 So Far</news:title>
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    <lastmod>2026-07-30T21:08:26Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>‘I Want Your Sex’ Is A Raunchy Plea For Young People To Have More Fun</news:title>
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      <news:genres>Blog</news:genres>
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    <loc>https://defector.com/wnba-suspends-seattle-storm-minority-owner-for-being-rude-to-transphobic-shitheads</loc>
    <lastmod>2026-07-30T20:07:24Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>WNBA Suspends Seattle Storm Minority Owner For Being Rude To Transphobic Shitheads</news:title>
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    <loc>https://defector.com/larry-obrien-trophy-reviewed-nba</loc>
    <lastmod>2026-07-30T18:14:31Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>A Review Of The Larry O&amp;#039;Brien Trophy, Or Anyway A Larry O&amp;#039;Brien Trophy</news:title>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://defector.com/is-it-even-possible-to-discipline-a-two-year-old</loc>
    <lastmod>2026-07-29T22:19:05Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>Is It Even Possible To Discipline A Two-Year-Old?</news:title>
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    <loc>https://defector.com/kyle-shanahan-and-the-49ers-are-not-entitled-to-anyones-trust</loc>
    <lastmod>2026-07-29T19:09:24Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>Kyle Shanahan And The 49ers Are Not Entitled To Anyone&amp;#039;s Trust</news:title>
      <news:publication_date>2026-07-29T18:44:39Z</news:publication_date>
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    <loc>https://defector.com/gianni-infantino-is-putting-the-world-cup-up-for-sale</loc>
    <lastmod>2026-07-30T16:42:57Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>Gianni Infantino Is Putting The World Cup Up For Sale</news:title>
      <news:publication_date>2026-07-29T18:21:46Z</news:publication_date>
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    <loc>https://defector.com/why-your-team-sucks-2026-new-york-giants</loc>
    <lastmod>2026-07-29T22:13:35Z</lastmod>
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        <news:name>Defector</news:name>
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      <news:title>Why Your Team Sucks 2026: New York Giants</news:title>
      <news:publication_date>2026-07-29T17:51:17Z</news:publication_date>
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    <loc>https://defector.com/the-mind-of-kyle-kuzma-is-expanding-at-an-alarming-rate</loc>
    <lastmod>2026-07-29T21:20:19Z</lastmod>
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        <news:name>Defector</news:name>
        <news:language>en</news:language>
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      <news:title>The Mind Of Kyle Kuzma Is Expanding At An Alarming Rate</news:title>
      <news:publication_date>2026-07-29T17:21:06Z</news:publication_date>
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    <loc>https://defector.com/live-laugh-like-and-subscribe</loc>
    <lastmod>2026-07-29T17:17:06Z</lastmod>
    <news:news>
      <news:publication>
        <news:name>Defector</news:name>
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      <news:title>Live, Laugh, Like And Subscribe</news:title>
      <news:publication_date>2026-07-29T17:00:57Z</news:publication_date>
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  <url>
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    <lastmod>2026-07-29T21:16:47Z</lastmod>
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      <news:publication>
        <news:name>Defector</news:name>
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      <news:title>There&amp;#039;s Big News In Necks</news:title>
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    <loc>https://defector.com/i-rode-the-tour-de-france-cauliflower</loc>
    <lastmod>2026-07-30T13:59:35Z</lastmod>
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      <news:title>I Rode The Tour de France Cauliflower</news:title>
      <news:publication_date>2026-07-29T14:23:24Z</news:publication_date>
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    <loc>https://defector.com/if-the-podcaster-desires-to-defeat-the-aggregator-he-must-look-inward</loc>
    <lastmod>2026-07-29T14:18:06Z</lastmod>
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        <news:name>Defector</news:name>
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      <news:title>If The Podcaster Desires To Defeat The Aggregator, He Must Look Inward</news:title>
      <news:publication_date>2026-07-29T13:46:06Z</news:publication_date>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://defector.com/in-a-summer-of-superstar-movement-steph-curry-is-conspicuously-at-home</loc>
    <lastmod>2026-07-29T13:47:56Z</lastmod>
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        <news:language>en</news:language>
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      <news:title>In A Summer Of Superstar Movement, Steph Curry Is Conspicuously At Home</news:title>
      <news:publication_date>2026-07-29T13:04:17Z</news:publication_date>
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