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Let Goofus And Gallant Teach You How To Catch A Baseball At The World Series

split screen of two fans at the World Series, one with a face mask and one without

The last couple weeks of October baseball have been an opportunity for a few thousand fans in Texas, where COVID-19 hospitalizations are on the rise, to see actual, competitive ballgames live and in person for the first time in basically a year. If you are a baseball fan in the state who does not have very high regard for matters of public health or your fellow Texans, you might be considering attending one of these games. But in the 12 months since last baseball season ended, you also may have forgotten how to behave at one of these things, especially in the midst of a pandemic, and perhaps even more so when baseballs are rocketing towards you at highway speeds. Goofus and Gallant are here to help remind you of a few basic tips for how to properly catch a baseball at these World Series games.

This is Goofus:

This is Gallant:

Goofus, as you can see, has a face mask that is not even attempting to cover his face. This is dangerous, rude, and in violation of MLB’s protocols. Gallant, on the other hand, is helping protect the people around him from COVID by wearing a mask that is snugly covering his mouth and his nose.

Now, let’s see what Gallant does when a foul ball comes his way.

That’s quite impressive! Not only does he make a clean catch that protects the woman and child sitting next to him, but he does not make a fool of himself on the celebration. He does not rip his mask off in triumph, nor does he move more than a few steps away from his assigned seat. Good job, Gallant.

OK Goofus, you give it a shot.

Hm, not so good. Aside from the aforementioned mask foul, this man’s ball-catching delirium seems to strip him of any self control. Seriously, buddy, what are you doing? Randy Arozarena does not need your glove. He has one of his own. Just please stay calm and try not to throw any objects onto the baseball field.

In summation, maybe don’t go to a baseball game with a crowd of 10,000 people at all right now. But if you must, try to follow Gallant’s example more than Goofus. Have a nice day.