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Holy Shit, It’s Mike Glennon!

mike glennon
Photo by Julio Aguilar/Getty Images

Did you hear the big news? Mike is back. You know who I’m talking about. Mike. Mike Glennon!

If it feels like you haven’t thought of Mike Glennon in years, well that’s because you haven’t. One has to go all the way back to 2017 to find the last time Glennon was the starting quarterback in an NFL game, when he was a member of the Chicago Bears. Glennon started just four games that season, throwing four touchdowns and five picks.

But who can forget all the good times we had with Mike? Remember all those, uh, passes he threw during his three seasons in Tampa Bay? He sure did throw the ball to some guys. And remember when the Bears decided to give him a contract with $19 million guaranteed, tried to convince everyone that they were “fired up” to have Glennon as the starter, and then benched him after just four games?

It’s always fun when a quarterback like Glennon bubbles up from the depths of the locker room to start a game or two at the tail end of a lost season. Such instances serve as nice opportunities to look back and take full stock of everything that went wrong for the team that is starting him. How the hell do you end up starting Mike Glennon in an NFL game in 2020? is a question that can lead you down some dark paths, each one indicative of just how bad things have gotten for the Jags and the league’s quarterback depth. Mike has thrown only 31 passes in the last two seasons. Mike Glennon is rarely the right answer to any of the important questions in life.

The good news for Glennon is that he probably only has to do this once. Gardner Minshew should be healthy enough to start Week 13 and guide his limping team across the season’s finish line. The better news for Glennon is that he might not even be the worst backup quarterback to take the field on Sunday. That designation probably belongs to Brandon Allen, who the Bengals are turning to in the wake of Joe Burrow’s season-ending injury. Allen entered the league as a Jaguars draft pick all the way back in 2016, and has since appeared in just three NFL games, all starts for the Broncos last season.

There’s truly nothing like late-season NFL games, which always offer fans the exciting opportunity to remember some guys who barely even qualify as Guys. And if you happen to miss the Mike Glennon show on Sunday, don’t worry, you’ll probably get another inexplicable chance to watch him sling it in 2022. Hope that opportunity is not provided by your team.