Hey! Did you know that Defector sends a daily newsletter, called The Cipher, to all subscribers in the Pal and Accomplice tiers? Each edition is curated by Lauren Theisen and features dispatches and recurring bits from various Defector staffers. The following post was originally published in the Feb. 22 edition of The Cipher. If you like it, and would like to have even more fun blogs emailed directly to you every day, consider becoming a Pal or Accomplice subscriber.
This is an important message for the boys.
Boys, lads, my guys! Hello it is me, your friend Kelsey. What am I always saying? Yes. That’s right. I’m always saying that there should be more kissing in sports. I know that this is maybe a silly request. Not everyone likes kissing. Boys often like to pretend they don’t like kissing. This is sad because men’s sports are the ones that need smooches the most. Kissing here, in this paragraph, is just a substitute for gentleness. Sports need gentleness, especially because so often they are very brutal. Remember the little butt taps baseball players used to give each other before they were in terrible union deliberations for eons? Those were nice, right?
I like to see people care about and for each other! Sue me! I think this is healthy. I think it is nice to see some big strong boys help each other! Sometimes, it is nice to be reminded that kindness is beautiful. Sometimes, boys can be gentle to each other, as a treat.
I have decided to send this very important memo because of some very gentlemanly kindness I observed on TikTok. This clip was posted by the MLS team Sporting Kansas City. I do not know anything about this team or MLS, so I asked my co-worker Luis who these nice men are. Luis was unfortunately not very helpful but he did tell me that the player on the left with the nice hair is named Graham Zusi. Luckily, there are many soccer knowers at Defector.com, so I asked Patrick to help me identify the second one. Here is what Patrick told us:
“The main character here, the nice advice-giving man, is Graham Zusi, a true MLS legend who’s been with them for like 15 years. He’s nice and. sweet and everyone loves him and he played in a World Cup.” (Wow. True. I love him.) Patrick continued, “The penny wearer is Uri Rosell, who just joined the club after playing with them from 2012-2014, and the other fella is a nice Scotsman.”
Wow. Isn’t this so nice? I could cry; I love it so much.
In the video, we see Zusi, who I now love, approach his teammate Uri Rosell. Rosell, embarrassingly, is wearing his penny backwards! The brand is in the front! But see how nicely he tells him. He doesn’t make fun of him! When Rosell says “What a stupid guy I am! I’ve been wearing this my whole life opposite!” Zusi says “I know,” and then kindly points out how it is now a v-neck.
Then they all hug with someone else (a mysterious player in yellow/Scotsman) who was not here for this conversation but just sees the hug happening and gets jealous. THIS IS BEAUTIFUL! THIS IS SO NICE! Bros helping bros! Bros hugging each other! How nice.
This has been an important public service announcement for the boys. Remember to be kind and gentle to your bros today and always. : )